Guardians 3000 #3 - Marvel Comics

GUARDIANS 3000 No. 3, February 2015

It is quite easy to see why any fan of Star-Lord of Spartax would be downright disappointed with this particular edition of “Guardians 3000”. For not only does the issue sport a stunningly colourful and dynamic Alex Ross cover featuring the definitive version of the interplanetary policeman swooping into action with his element gun firing. But internally it boldly declares that the month’s story title is “Lord Of Stars”. Yet in reality, the character of King Peter only actually makes an appearance, albeit a highly dramatic one, within the last few of pages of the comic book.

However, any lasting sense of disillusionment over this ‘no-show’ will almost certainly be ‘swamped’ by broad bewilderment, as writer Dan Abnett begins feeding the reader with his somewhat implausible and incomprehensible explanation as to why the Peace Summit at the Hideaway Parliament was previously attacked and why the mysterious A-Sentience want the Guardians Of The Galaxy dead.

 

To be succinct the tech constructs, also known as the (Anthony) Stark, and heavily influenced by the outward appearance of the playboy inventor’s Iron Man armour, are afraid of the death of reality. The synthetic constructs are therefore hunting Geena Drake because they perceive the Human to be “part of the problem and part of the solution” due to her awareness of the progressive erosion of time. To make matters even more baffling a Stark Body Unit befriends Yondu Udonta, Charlie-27 and Drake, when it is informed that the Guardians have fought alongside the robot’s Progenitor a thousand years earlier.

 

Bearing in mind the destructive chaos and murderous slaughter the mind-controlled Badoon have wrought upon the galaxy in order to try and achieve the A-Sentience’s goal of destroying the space-faring superhero team, this seems an incredibly weak justification for the killer robot to suddenly just ‘swap sides’. It also does not explain, bearing in mind the machine forms part of the Stark ‘collective mind’ so therefore it now knows of the Guardians history with Iron Man, why the rest of the techno-organic species are still determined for the heroes to “Submit to A-Sentience”? As Drake would say Abnett is “freaking me the flark out.”

Unfortunately Gerardo Sandoval would appear equally as bemused and bewildered by the plot’s proceedings as his artwork is both inconsistent and at times dishearteningly poor. Admittedly the Mexican graphics designer provides a very strong cohesive visual image for the Stark Body Unit and the rest of the A-Sentience. But a number of his panels featuring Charlie-27 and Geena in particular, suffer from such pitiful pencilling that each character is endowed with some quite grotesque facial expressions.

The variant cover art of "GUARDIANS 3000" No. 3 by Gerardo Sandoval

The Amazing Spider-Man #7 - Marvel Comics

THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN No. 7, December 2014

Colourfully rendered by the team of Giuseppe Camuncoli, Cam Smith and Antonio Fabela, the cover illustration to this issue of “The Amazing Spider-Man” would appear demonstrative of the two minds writer Dan Slott was presumably in when plotting the book’s central storyline. For whereas previously the American author contained the simmerings of the ‘Spider-Verse’ within the main body of the comic, in this particular edition he has quite clearly chosen to separate one from the other; as highlighted not only by the “Edge Of Spider-Verse” sub-headline on the book’s front page but because “Ms. Marvel Team-Up” is actually scripted by Slott’s frequent collaborator Christos Gage.

Just why the former “Ren & Stimpy” author found splitting the book’s contents necessary however is unclear. For although the additional plot of Billy Braddock in “Web Of Fear” is far removed from Spidey’s battle with a Kree impersonating Captain Marvel, it is only eight pages long. So could quite easily have been absorbed and interspersed between the predominant plot’s action of the hospital abduction, appearance of Kamala Khan as Ms. Marvel and nightmarish transformation of Minn-Erva.

In fact the need for such a convoluted secondary adventure, set within the matriarchal Otherworld of the Captain Britain Corp is not really readily apparently. Admittedly alternative universes are always popular, and it is interesting from time to time to visit such realms and experience so totally different an incarnation of the Steve Ditko’s super-hero. But this particular publication is about Peter Parker’s version of Web-head, so should surely focus upon his exploits rather than the misgivings of Spider-UK from Earth-833?

Rather than create such a fantastical device as the Watchtower scrying room why instead did Slott not simply bestow such visions upon ‘our’ universe’s wall-crawler? Possibly as vivid precognitive visions resulting from his physical contact with Silk, or even simply his very own Spider-sense? Even a series of (day) dream sequences requiring the insightful interpretations of the Sorcerer Supreme Doctor Strange could have provided the reader with the pertinent plot points that ‘the hunt was on’ but still have kept all the reader’s attention upon 'our' Spidey. The two narratives could even have retained the services of their respective different colorists, possibly adding to the surreal quality of the ‘Spider-Verse’ segments.

As it is however Slott relies upon the questionable talent of Antonia Fabela for “Ms. Marvel Team-Up” and Edgar Delgado for the shorter secondary story. Albeit the dreadful quality of the artwork on the book’s first few pages, depicting Silk and Anna Maria Marconi, is so poor that it is hard to credit a third individual was not involved in their creation, or to acknowledge that penciller Giuseppe Camuncou actually did draw the entire comic.

The variant cover art of "AMAZING SPIDER-MAN" No. 7 by Gary Choo

Zombies Vs. Robots #1 - IDW Publishing

ZOMBIES VS. ROBOTS No. 1, January 2015

Though initially potentially inaccessible, there is something distinctly refreshing about this anthology. For rather than being the ‘standard comic fare’ “Zombies Vs. Robots” contains a collection of three ongoing strips, drawn by a pool of writers and artists. As such the stories are distinctly short, definitely different in their artistic styles and delightfully diverse in their viewpoints of the same world; one in which gun-toting poorly programmed robots have slaughtered not only hordes of zombies but decimated Mankind as well.

However in order to immerse oneself into this post-apocalyptic world, a reader must first persevere past the terrifically-stylized ‘oil on canvas’ cover illustration of a robot literally disarming a zombie by Ashley Wood. The title’s co-creator is both a successful fine artist, with sell out exhibitions in New York and Paris, as well as a consummate concept designer, and this really shows despite the somewhat grisly subject matter of his painting. But the picture is probably not what a reader would ordinarily expect depicted upon the front page of a comic; certainly not without being a variant cover such as those rendered by Alex Ross. 

Unfortunately the artwork upon turning the page, this time drawn by Anthony Diecidue, is perhaps not exactly encouraging either and whilst increasingly competent, the Los Angeles-based artist’s sketchings are arguably also an acquired taste. Fortunately though, Chris Ryall’s penmanship is absolutely ‘top dollar’ and his first tale “Inherit The Earth” swiftly becomes incredibly engrossing as it provides the backstory as to the calamity which has befallen Mother Earth. Namely a man-made portal to another dimension has created a doorway to a world of infected undead, who now unendingly stagger through into our universe. Robotic guards designed to cull the walking cadavers have proved rather over-zealous creations, as unable to differentiate between the living and the zombies they’ve essentially eradicated both from the face of the planet with just the occasional “Say goodbye, Pinky.”

“Tales of ZVR” is also written by Ryall, with Wood providing some heavily inked sketches for the tiny tale’s two pages. A simple tale of a boy and his bot looking for his Pa, the young lad quickly discovers his father did not actually get all that far when the man left to get help. It is short, sweet and sentimental but very nicely done. 

Finally Issue One closes with the far more ‘normal-looking’ comic book adventure "The Orphan", scribed by Steve Niles and proficiently drawn by Val Mayerik. Hunted by both the Undead and a seriously deranged rodent-killing robot, a long-haired youth scavenges the wasteland looking for parts to build his very own automaton. This is an extremely enjoyable concluding episode and one within which the reader can almost hear the haunting words and melody of The Ink Spots singing ‘I Don’t Want To Set The World On Fire’ in the background.

The variant cover art of "ZOMBIES VS. ROBOTS" No. 1 by Gabriel Rodriguez

The Amazing Spider-Man #6 - Marvel Comics

THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN No. 6, November 2014

Despite being the conclusion to Dan Slott’s “Lucky To Be Alive” six-issue story arc, it is rather hard to imagine why such an unremarkable, though competently written, twenty-one page book managed to so dominate the sales figures for September 2014; finishing fifth, at least according to Diamond Comic Distributors, with an estimated 93,564 copies being sold. True the final confrontation between the Black Cat, Electro, Spider-Man and Silk must have been a highly anticipated affair, as both super-villains had been depicted as itching to secure their revenge against the Wall-Crawler since his series' re-launch. But once Cindy Moon rescues the titular character from his televised unmasking at the (clawed) hands of Felicia Hardy there really isn’t that much to get excited about until the final third of the narrative... Except perhaps the sheer volume of electrical lightning effects Humberto Ramos has to pencil and Edgar Delgado colour whilst illustrating Max Dillon overpowering the Parker Industries containment pod?

Possibly a more pertinent question in relation to Issue Six of "The Amazing Spider-Man" however is what exactly has the Berkeley-born author done to the personality of the Black Cat? The "expert burglar" has often walked a fine line between criminality, compassion and justice. Yet in this storyline there isn’t a trace of the feline fighter who was once offered the chance to join the Avengers by the Vision. Instead Marv Wolfman and Keith Pollard’s co-creation is disconcertingly portrayed as a potential ‘queen of crime’ and the leader of a new underworld organisation.

The Diamond Gem Award-winner also never makes it terribly clear what exactly the black-suited probability manipulator is actually planning? It's evident that Hardy has descended into a malicious homicidal villain of the highest order as a result of her intent to kill a befuddled Electro by ‘over-amping’ a device designed to cure him and have the entire murderous incident captured on live television. But how precisely does such an act grant the Black Cat her highly sought revenge upon Spider-Man? 

Sadly any bemused readers of this magazine couldn't even take some solace in Peter Parker’s alter-ego saving the day, as its Slott’s newly-created superstar Silk who ultimately thwarts Felicia's plans. Indeed, once again Web-head, absurdly illustrated to the point of resembling N’Kantu the Living Mummy due to his many web-wrappings, is essentially ‘benched’ upon the side-lines comforting an agonised Dillon. Whilst Moon not only rescues a helicopter full of reporters, but ultimately both an incapacitated Spider-Man and Electro too. Not bad for someone who has only been a super-heroine for just a couple of days...

Writer: Dan Slott, Artist: Humberto Ramos, and Inker: Victor Olazaba

The Thing #7 - Marvel Comics

THE THING No. 7, July 2006

Writing a successful comedy romance for a comic book, especially one which features the orange rock-like human mutate Benjamin Grimm as one of the potential ‘involved parties’, is presumably quite a difficult accomplishment to achieve. Certainly it must be so without the author heavily relying upon physical slapstick humour and allowing the storyline to degenerate into clownish farce. For with “Dis Man, Dis Monster, Disarmed!” Dan Slott manages to corrupt a potentially touching heart-warming story of two former long-time lovers reuniting for a birthday celebration into an embarrassing charade of buffoonery. One which later even momentarily manages to turn dark and menacing as The Thing presses his intentions upon Alicia Masters a little too forcefully.

Indeed it seems arguably evident that the American comic book writer didn’t really know what sort of story he wanted to create for this issue as at first the script seems to touch upon the macabre as the founding member of the Fantastic Four finds himself in the clutches of his sweetheart’s stepfather, the super-villain known as the Puppet Master. Manacled to a ceiling, the “rock-covered freak” can only watch helplessly as the artisan manipulates Alicia into passionately embracing her current boyfriend Arlo North. Overwrought at the sight and wholly in the thrall of Phillip Masters, Grimm starts to literally beat himself up.

Fortunately this disturbing scene is nothing more than a bad dream, but having explored its meaning with Sue Richards, it seems to motivate the former space pilot into attempting to win back the woman he loves… Something which under Slott’s guiding pen, can only mean a misguided humiliating journey back to Ancient Greece for one of the Marvel Universe’s most noble characters.

Admittedly there is much amusement to be had once the super-strong Hercules has been introduced into the story. But as there isn’t any actual reason for the head-strong god to continually ‘slug-it-out’ with The Thing except for the drunken sot’s desire for ‘a monster to fight’, the humorous depictions of both combatants flying through the air smashing trees and literally disarming statues quickly becomes tediously tiring. Unimaginatively this confrontation is eventually resolved by the blind sculptor simply stepping in-between the two bruisers, and following this act Ben and Alicia’s “classic” relationship blossoms anew. 

Perhaps as equally bemused by this potential time-travelling trip into ‘the Twilight Zone’ artist Kieron Dwyer provides some inconsistent and jarringly awkward-looking illustrations throughout the book. Though his pencilling of both Hercules and The Thing crashing into wine barrels, foliage and marble pillars is extremely well animated and full of action-packed energy.

Story: Dan Slott, Artist: Kieron Dwyer, and Colors: Laura Villari

The Amazing Spider-Man #5 - Marvel Comics

THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN No. 5, October 2014

In many ways this issue of “The Amazing Spider-Man” is reminiscent of the small “Missing In Action” crossover story-arc of 1986, in which the super-hero disappeared for a month and was replaced in all of his books by characters such as Silver Sable and the Black Cat. Admittedly writer Dan Slott doesn’t go to such an extreme as to completely remove Web-head from this edition. But the majority of the comic’s twenty pages do rather focus on the Black Cat’s machinations to muscle in on the New York Maggia and exact a ‘revealing revenge’ upon Spidey in front of J. Jonah Jameson and national television.

This is in no-way a bad thing however as the storyline almost draws both Felicia Hardy and the reader back to 1987 when (second-tier) crime lords such as the Rose, Silvermane, Jack O’Lantern, Hammerhead and Hobgoblin were tearing New York City apart during the explosive five-issue arc “Gang War.” Only this time it is the criminal network belonging to the Eel which suffers as the Black Cat and Electro muscle in upon the territories neighbouring those owned by the syndicates of the Goblin King and Mister Negative.

Eventually however the cat burglar and Max Dillon return to their primary goal of defeating Spider-Man, who has finally recomposed himself following some quite distasteful half-naked rutting scenes with Cindy Moon. Perhaps unsurprisingly however it isn’t the spectacular super-hero who the villains initially face but Silk, having been touted by Marvel Senior Editor Nick Lowe as being destined to be “…a major Spider character over the next couple of years.”

Only once the girl who “got bit by the same spider that Peter Parker did” has paired off with Electro does Web-head finally emerge from the side-lines, and then Spider-Man is so frighteningly ineffective that he is quickly overwhelmed by a stray lightning bolt from Dillon and rendered defenceless by the Black Cat.

Having clearly obtained some considerable practice in drawing and colouring the bright luminescent ‘zig-zagging’ energies of the former electrical engineer in previous issues, artist Humberto Ramos and colorist Edgar Delgado really put on an illustrative ‘tour de force’ for much of this comic. Especially impressive is the Mexican penciller’s depiction of the Black Cat, who is wonderfully sketched as being sensual and demure in one panel and then feline and ferocious in the next as she lashes out at Web-head with the cable from her grappling hook.

Writer: Dan Slott, Artist: Humberto Ramos, and Inker: Victor Olazaba

Batman: Battle For The Cowl #3 - DC Comics

BATMAN: BATTLE FOR THE COWL No. 3, July 2009

As conclusions go for a multi-issue story-arc “Last Man Standing” must rank as one of the most dissatisfying comics published, as very few of the plethora of plot points generated by the preceding two issues are resolved within its thirty pages. Indeed only a single question appears to be successfully answered and that occurs within the book’s final few panels as Dick Grayson officially dons the cape and cowl of Batman. However his arguably natural succession simply confirms what any reasonable thinking Bat-fan would have anticipated anyway… Nightwing inherits the Mantle of the Bat; at least until Bruce Wayne’s inevitable resurrection.

So what about all the other conundrums Tony Daniel’s writing conjures up during “The Battle For The Cowl”? How did the military manage to incarcerate the Penguin? How did Two-face manage to escape via Gotham Canal on a Police launch boat? Just why is making Gotham City a war zone “the greatest night” of Black Mask’s life? Besides having had two rival crime lords removed what has Jeremiah Arkham actually achieved? Doug Moench’s creation has hardly supplanted the two rogues as the ‘kingpin’ of Gotham. And just where is the super-villain’s army of escaped inmates anyway? Have the Marines captured them as well as Oswald Cobblepot?

However perhaps the biggest hole in the American writer’s storyline is just why seeing a holographic image of Bruce Wayne telling him he needed the help of a psychologist make Jason Todd go utterly insane and literally become the Dark Knight. The former Robin has gone on a truly bloody killing spree during this title’s brief run and the motivation behind this is apparently as simple as him not caring for this mentor’s belief that he’s yet to mentally heal from his traumatic experiences as a child? If this was the case and he hated the industrialist billionaire so much why would the former street orphan want to imitate him by becoming Batman and having either Time Drake or Grayson as his side-kick Robin?

Unfortunately Daniel’s artwork is equally as stretched as his ‘wafer-thin’ writing with his depictions of a red-eyed half-crazed Todd-Batman and Nightwing proving to be disappointingly lack-lustre and robotic; despite the pair frantically fighting in hand-to-hand combat against one another for most of the comic. In fact their confrontation’s culmination, a huge sprawling double-page spread of Grayson flattening his one-time successor with a mighty flying kick atop a hurtling tube-train, is one of the most disappointing drawings of the trilogy and made all the worse for its prodigious size.

The variant cover art of "BATMAN: BATTLE FOR THE COWL" No. 3 by Tony S. Daniel