Master Of Kung Fu #2 - Marvel Comics

MASTER OF KUNG FU No. 2, August 2015

In many ways “Master’s Son” could be viewed as being worringly similar in narrative to a typical episode of the 1972 American martial arts television series “Kung Fu”, as the comic’s entire storyline seems to focus upon the titular character’s desire to elude a confrontation with his people’s oppressive authorities. However whereas the ABC drama’s hero tried to avoid conflict and violence as a result of his spiritual training and genuine desire for a peaceful life, Haden Blackman’s incarnation of Shang-Chi shuns oppression and adversity because he’s a drunken coward. In fact all “the disgraced son of Emperor Zheng Zu” wants to do is “drink away his pain in anonymity.”

Such a disagreeable, dishonourable depiction of Jim Starlin’s co-creation is difficult to like, especially when so clearly able a fighter simply stands by and allows one of his teenage rescuers to be bloodily gutted by the maniacal Laughing Skull. Indeed there really isn’t much to admire about the unshaven, unkempt alcoholic at all, as he first soundly bests all of the Outcasts who saved him from his father’s thugs, whilst mocking each one for being “slow and sloppy”, and then destroys any hope which they had for a ‘better brighter (Battle)world’ by graphically telling them how he would torture, main and finally execute them all if he were to do the Emperor’s bidding.

As a result when the expert in “nine of Zheng Zu’s legendary ten techniques” does finally admit his fears, decides he must compete for the throne in the thirteen chambers and therefore begrudgingly asks his ‘surviving students’ to “take me as your Master”, it is hard to feel anything more than revulsion for this prospective saviour of K’un Lun.

Unfortunately the vast majority of the Writer’s Guild of America Award-winner’s supporting cast are equally as unlikable, with supposed “honourable protector of K’un Lun”, the Iron Fist Rand K’ai proving to be as much of a despicable ruffian as the rest of his Emperor’s minions. Even the one-eyed Outcast leader Callisto shows her true colours by betraying the location of her teammates’ secret hideaway to Zheng Zu’s entourage in order to obtain “acceptance into the ten rings.”  

Fortunately Dalibor Talajic does occasionally bring some enjoyment to the proceedings with his well-animated fight sequences and his interesting re-imaginings of classic “Marvel Worldwide” villains, such as a vagabond Bullseye and severely chastised Razor Fist. However the quality of the Croatian artist’s illustrations lack consistency and at times appear a little too stiff-looking and anatomically awkward.

Writer: Haden Blackman, Penciler: Dalibor Talajic, and Inker: Goran Sudzuka

Midnighter #1 - DC Comics

MIDNIGHTER No. 1, August 2015

Whilst Warren Ellis’ co-creation has often been criticised for being little more than an ultra-violent clone of Batman, especially when drawn alongside the character’s ‘superman-surrogate’ husband Apollo. This solo outing, written by Steve Orlando and “rated teen plus”, depicts the super-hero in a vein which is far more akin to that which was envisaged when the “incredible bad-ass” was first conceived. That is “The Shadow by way of John Woo.”

However having the black-clad vigilante going back “to his roots” isn’t necessarily a good thing, especially when the “Undertow” author decides that the entire storyline for Issue One of “Midnighter” is simply going to be about “lots of punching” as the former Stormwatch member “learns how to be a normal person.” In fact a terrific amount of this magazine’s twenty(ish) pages concern themselves with Lucas Trent simply dining, committing “ritual suicide by cholesterol”, playing pool, dating in Moscow, or rather graphically conducting “a rigorous physical examination” of his new boyfriend, Jason.

Admittedly Orlando makes good on his promise of the “masked ass-kicker” being as brutal as ever by having the artificially enhanced human seriously take down a heavily armed group of killers who foolishly interrupt his evening meal in a restaurant. But frankly the appallingly confusing and overly complicated art of Aco ruins any enjoyment to be had from the scene. Something which is especially disheartening as Midnighter delivers some of his infamously sadistic yet wonderfully witty one-liners during the free-for-all; “I’ll burst your eyeballs and punch my fist into your liver.”

Sadly the "Batman: Future's End" artist is unfortunately responsible for a good deal of this comic’s inaccessibility and in some ways it is actually a relief to see his horrendously busy panels and pages being momentarily overshadowed by an incredibly intruding advertisement for a Twix chocolate bar mid-way through the magazine!?! Those readers willing to pour some significant time pondering Aco’s illustrations will doubtless marvel at the blunt force trauma depicted within the penciller’s minute x-ray montages. But for any casual peruser of this periodical most of the pictures, especially those containing any form of dynamic action, disappointingly appear as something of a mess to be deciphered rather than enjoyed.

Writer: Steve Orlando, Penciller: Aco, and Inkist: Aco with Hugo Petrus

Wytches #1 - Image Comics

WYTCHES No. 1, October 2014

Selling an impressive 67,996 copies upon its release in October 2014, this very ‘personal childhood journey’ by writer Scott Snyder is a decidedly disturbing comic book. One which despite containing strong sexual references, profanities and gore, actually owes most of its quite considerable ‘fear factor’ to the threat of it's narrative taking the reader out into the woods, alone at night, looking for the tell-tale signs of “witches and warlocks.”

However whereas such ‘fright-fests’ like “The Blair Witch Project” gradually build up to a spine-chilling climax, this magazine’s plot, inspired by the American author’s memory of a terrified friend seeing “something peeking out from behind a tree” at them whilst playing in the forest, throws the reader straight into a traumatising tragedy from the very first page. Indeed the memory of a facially mutilated mother, finding herself trapped within the trunk of a great tree and calling out to her nearby infant son for help will literally haunt any bibliophile for the rest of their read. Especially when her terrified desperate pleas are answered by the child giving their parent a dizzying blow to the head with a rock because “pledged is pledged.”

Fortunately Snyder’s storyline does somewhat calm down for a brief period, allowing the “Batman” scribe a little time with which to fill in some background details to his story’s main protagonists, Charlie and Sailor Rook. But before long, their family home has been invaded by a crazed tongue-biting wild deer and the perverted High School bully Annie makes the fatal mistake of going into the woods and getting far too close to a certain tree; “Help! Help! Hel--”

Arguably the biggest contributor to this periodical’s aura of awfulness and dread though has to be the unnerving artwork of Mark “Jock” Simpson. The Scottish penciller’s admittedly rough-looking illustrations, seemingly inked upon canvas, provide this comic’s darker moments with a sharp perturbing edge and whilst his sketches are somewhat amateurish-looking, there is no doubting that his panels depicting bloody mutilation don’t hold the attention. In fact the former “2000 A.D.” artist seems especially talented at depicting moments of physical dismemberment as well as making trees appear especially sinister and creepy even in the daytime.

The variant cover art of "WYTCHES" No. 1 by Francesco Francavilla

Uber #5 - Avatar Press

UBER No. 5, August 2013

Profanities, inappropriate sexual references and graphically gory mutilations aside, Issue Five of “Uber” is strangely reminiscent of the patriotic stories found within the black and white pages of British war comic “Commando War Stories”. For seldom has a magazine’s narrative been so ‘pumped full’ of fervour for ‘King and Country’.

Straight from the start, as Field Marshal Bernard Montgomery briefs the Allies’ “enhanced humans”, there is a genuine atmosphere to the proceedings of ‘England expecting every man to do his duty’. A feeling which is especially well-written by Kieron Gillen considering that the former Commander of the Eighth Army has “a few of our American friends along with us on this endeavour” and in fact the British grouping’s “appropriate counter” to Battleship Sieglinde is a former Yank pilot, haphazardly named H.M.H. Colossus. 

This sense of intense national pride and zeal intensifies as the Battle for Paris begins and the “small force of Allied Tankmen” are hastily deployed to the streets of the French capital. Two pages of reading about the ‘Jackboots’ dominating the defending conventional forces later and the scene is well and truly set for “the first enhanced human battlefield” as Panzermensch Matthias Scholtz is brutalised by “a bunch of British working class guys.”

What then follows is a titanic confrontation between the very best which the Allies can muster and the pride of the Fuhrer’s Uber programme. The tension is genuinely palpable and everything appears to be going so well for Patrick O’Connor and Montgomery’s “single international battalion.” Klaudia has been engaged and lured to Colossus’ locale, and within moments the American has wounded the blonde-haired giantess by ‘warping’ part of her back, warded off her initial psychic ‘disruption halo’ attack and pummelled the mass-murderess to within an inch of her life... Then, with victory in sight, the former computer games journalist has the reader turn over the page and one’s heart sinks as Winston Churchill’s great hope becomes the “first battleship-class casualty killed in action.”

Such a well-written horrifically compelling read, which at best portrays ‘a pyrrhic Allied victory’, is doubly exhausting an experience due to Caanan White’s insanely well-drawn illustrations. The African-American’s pencilling is as wonderfully rendered as his subject matter is grotesque, with stand-out moments such as Scholtz being stomped to death and Sieglinde tearing off her foes arms at the shoulders appearing all the more wincingly vivid and ghastly as a result.

The regular cover art of "UBER" No. 5 by Caanan White

Skull The Slayer #1 - Marvel Comics

SKULL THE SLAYER No. 1, August 1975

It is somewhat easy to understand why it took creator/writer and colorist Marv Wolfman four years to sell the basic notion of this comic book “to someone… anyone.” For despite the support of “Rascally” Roy Thomas, another “dinosaur buff”, and a determination to have the title sell “month after month”, the rudimentary storyline to Issue One of “Skull The Slayer” is still arguably little more than the unoriginal tale of a group of Bermuda-bound passengers somehow crash-landing back in time to the Jurassic period.

However, whereas the two-time Jack Kirby Award-winner originally envisaged thrusting “an entire mid-town Manhatten office building into a Prehistoric setting”, “The Coming Of Skull The Slayer!” published storyline contains a rather more intriguing, compelling narrative. Something which perfectly demonstrates Wolfman’s belief that the eighteen-page adventure “was worth the wait” as his “ideas matured, some concepts grew, some changed” and “all hopefully improved.”

Much of this early success is down to the Shazam Award-winner's creation of James Patrick Scully, a disillusioned Vietnam veteran who has been wrongfully arrested for the murder of his drug-addicted brother. Indeed the vast majority of this “book that would make you go Arrgh!” focuses solely upon the titular character, and provides Skull with an especially edgy backstory which not only provides an explanation as to why he would attempt to unbelievably overpower a Tyrannosaurus Rex with a decidedly thin-looking spear and a large rock. But also why the trained fighter would so readily try and adapt to the life of a hunter-gatherer; “Sergeant Scully of the dinosaur patrol reportin’ in, sir.”

Interestingly though, despite his ability to ‘acclimatise’ to his surroundings, wrestling a bovine-like mammal to the ground in the process, Wolfman’s “star” is actually quite the anti-hero and repeatedly demonstrates his mantra of putting himself first by battering his military escort as their plane breaks apart in the sky and failing to search for any other survivors because ‘he’s tabbed enough charred corpses in his five years’. The “bright boy” even demonstrates some mental instability by bursting into hysterical “insane cackling laughter” on a couple of occasions when his dire lonely situation strikes home and he realises “he’s totally out of his league.”

Unfortunately the Brooklyn-born writer’s overly-used and jargon-filled narration isn’t anywhere near as engaging as his creation. Indeed the New Yorker’s nasty habit of explaining everything in some sort of ‘Seventies jive talk’ becomes infuriatingly off-putting extremely quickly and ruins not only the intensity of an arguably contentious backstory. But also the drama of Scully’s perilous primordial predicament.

Possibly the highlight of this Bronze Age bi-monthly though is artist Steve Gan’s wonderfully drawn ‘great giant reptiles’. The Star-Lord co-creator really conveys a sense of scale and bestial dynamism to the primeval world’s carnivorous inhabitants, especially that of the tyrant lizard as it hunts Scully through the undergrowth. As a result it is very clear why Wolfman would state within the comic’s editorial “Old Funny Animals” that “when the final art came in, I finally let out my sigh” as “Steve Gan had done a fantastic job.”

Creator/Writer/Colorist: Marv Wolfman, Artist: Steve Gan, and Letterer: Pablo Marcos

Darth Vader #5 - Marvel Comics

DARTH VADER No. 5, July 2015

When Kieron Gillen writes at the start of this comic book that a “crisis” has struck the galaxy, it is highly unlikely that the former computer games journalist was specifically referring to his interpretation of the Dark Lord of the Sith. But just reading the British author’s ‘opening crawl’ should make most readers realise just how far removed this “Marvel Worldwide” version of the former Jedi Knight is from anything which creator George Lucas ever conceived. Certainly the producer’s original motion picture trilogy never suggests that in-between films Darth Vader surrounds himself with a young teenage archaeologist, a couple of psychopathic droids, a wookie bounty hunter and “a personal army composed of battle droids from a forgotten factory on the planet Geonosis.”

Indeed the narrative to this “penultimate part of our opening arc” almost makes it impossible to reconcile any of Gillen’s narrative with official canon, even when the one-time “Warhammer Monthly” worker attempts to pay homage to the celluloid classics; such as the Sith apprentice’s “illegal boarding” of “the bad guy’s secret base”, which clearly attempts to replicate the suspense and excitement of the Empire’s firefight within the Rebel blockade runner Tantive IV.

Such difficulties are predominantly caused by the ex-music correspondent’s premise that the Emperor Palpatine is considering turning his back upon the “obsolete” Force and employing a retinue of technologically enhanced apprentices instead. Such a preposterous notion is deemed “blasphemous” by the black armoured giant. But it is much worse than that. It is downright idiotic and as foolish as the illustrations of Morit using his techno-implants to imitate closing a door using the force, and leaping away from Vader’s lightsabre using rocket boots!?!

In fact the only thing more ridiculous is Cylo-V’s entourage, which besides two Obi-Wan Kenobi wannabes, comprises of a goggle-eyed scientist, a Mon Calamari, a Trandoshan, an Imperial probe droid and more Jedi training remotes than you’d ever want to swing a laser-sword at… And Gillen would have the reader believe ‘these are the successors to the Force’ and are to replace Darth Vader as the right hand of the Emperor?

Perhaps just as befuddled as this title’s bibliophiles is Salvador Larroca, whose artwork begins well enough, with some excellent illustrations of the Sith’s battle with Cyclo-V’s humanoid security forces. But once Morit and Aiolin are introduced midway through the magazine, the Spanish cartographer’s pencilling deteriorates quite noticeably. So much so that by the end of the comic, the artist’s drawings of Vader’s replacements, especially the Trandoshan and Mon Calamari, are quite appalling.

The variant cover art of "DARTH VADER" No. 5 by Salvador Larroca

Joe Frankenstein #3 - IDW Publishing

JOE FRANKENSTEIN No. 3, April 2015

Delayed and “late arriving in the stores” as a result of the Long Beach Dock Strike, co-writer Graham Nolan was not lying when he stated that “the wait will be worth it!” For Issue Three of “Joe Frankenstein” is a furiously fast-paced comic, whose energic action-packed narrative starts with an all-out frontal assault upon the monster’s secret windmill hideout by Lord Golgatha and an army of pointy-eared vampires, and doesn’t stop until the book ends with Mary Shelley’s creation helplessly manacled before the Bride with the ominous words “to be continued!” emblazoned upon the foot of the final panel.

Equally as entertaining is the fact that despite the intensity of the plot, Nolan and “frequent collaborator” Chuck Dixon still somehow manage to include plenty of backstory to the likes of “the Big Guy”, Enoch and the werewolf chauffeur Finnabar. Indeed these ‘insights’ into some of the creative duo’s supporting cast provides some seriously laugh out loud moments amidst a genuinely tense pulse-pounding read. With Frankenstein’s diminutive manservant, “and… tasty little morsel”, proving especially humorous once armed with the “vampire-tested, National Rifle Association-approved” ultra-violent pulse rifle; “I love the smell of napalm in the morning.”

These fun quips and gags however are not exclusively the province of Joe’s companions with even some of the ghoulish grey-skinned blood-drinkers themselves having a few comedic one-liners. Fortunately though such a wealth of amusing moments doesn’t distract from the sheer pace of events as they unfold. In fact if anything they enhance them by momentarily giving the reader a brief pause to smile before being flung headfirst back into the ‘chaotic melee’ as the mummified Egyptian horror’s minions desperately try in vain to capture “the Boy.”

The quality of Graham Nolan’s illustrations also seems to be somewhat invigorated by the upbeat tempo of this magazine’s storyline, with the former “Knightfall” artist creating some extremely well-detailed drawings, most notably that of the monster slaying his creator in a flash-back single-page splash. Disappointingly though there are still more than a few panels where “The Phantom” penciller’s work appears rushed and inconsistent, and dishearteningly these seem to increase in number as the book progresses, almost as if Nolan was rushed for time towards the end.

The regular cover art of "JOE FRANKENSTEIN" No. 3 by Graham Nolan