All-Star Batman #14 - DC Comics

ALL-STAR BATMAN No. 14, December 2017

Only the Twenty-Ninth best-selling title in October 2017, at least according to “Diamond Comic Distributors”, this decisive instalment of the so-called “crown jewel of DC Rebirth” arguably depicts its titular character at his most impotent and ineffective, with Bruce Wayne’s alter-ego repeatedly requiring an airborne machinegun-toting Alfred Pennyworth to rescue him from the clutches of Briar and the scything blades of the Nemesis Program’s Dark Knight. In fact, the Caped Crusader is so poorly portrayed within this “final issue of Scott Snyder’s high-octane run on All-Star Batman” that it’s 55,614 readers were probably extremely grateful the book was being cancelled, especially when in its closing moments the new York-born writer has the cowled crime-fighter on his knees literally begging his superior opponent to look inside himself and find “a piece of you that’s good and kind” so the victorious combatant won’t kill him..!

To make matters worse, the assailant who has defeated Batman every time they have fought throughout this piratical-themed story-arc, and usually within the time it takes to peruse a single panel, is revealed to be none other than a young clone of the billionaire playboy’s butler who has been brain-washed by MI5’s elderly rogue operative; “He’s written from you, from cells you left behind. But with no life to separate him from, no father, no mother. This boy, he’s all you could have been and more.” Such a ludicrously absurd revelation would ordinarily prove impossible to outmatch, yet incredibly the Stan Lee Award-winner achieves this by subsequently proposing that the cold-hearted killer with an established track-record of murder and mayhem, would instantly turn upon his father-figure and betray him after simply hearing a few words from a badly wounded, grovelling in the blood-soaked sand Batman.!?!

Fortunately, this twenty-two periodical’s one redeeming feature is Rafael Albuquerque’s pencils, inks and cover. Snyder publically stated upon the news of this title’s cancellation that he wanted to give his scripts’ artists “creative freedom so I’d be challenged to write differently, [and] try new things”. But in the case of Issue Fourteen of “All-Star Batman” it is undoubtedly the abilities of the “exclusive artist from DC Comics” whose skills were sorely tested in order to turn the American author’s bizarre ‘retconning’ of Alfred’s military background into something which was at least pleasing to the eye.

Indeed, the Brazilian illustrator, along with collaborative writer Rafael Scavone, additionally provides this comic’s secondary tale, “Killers-In-Law”, with a noticeably nice touch by divulging that the vicious, heavily tattooed Princes Vik whom the Caped Crusader bested during an arms deal at the Moscow Canal in Russia, is these days better known as the Head of the Myasnik Family. This “Killer Queen” is then cleverly depicted by the “co-creator of American Vampire” selling the secret location of the Genesis Engine to the Black and Whites, thereby setting in motion the events of Scott’s “The First Ally” narrative.

Script: Scott Snyder, and Pencils, Inks & Cover: Rafael Albuquerque

All-Star Batman #13 - DC Comics

ALL-STAR BATMAN No. 13, October 2017

In many ways, it’s a pity that “DC Comics” didn’t decide to cancel “All-Star Batman” before Scott Snyder finished writing the script to “The First Ally” and it was serialised into this short-lived ongoing title’s final story-arc. For whilst the narrative’s fourth instalment makes for a pulse-pounding, rather entertaining read, it does imply that a concatenation of dedicated tales focusing upon Alfred’s fifty-two missions “all over the world” as “the wayward Black Knight” would have made for a far more captivating experience than the seemingly rushed, brusquely written adventure which the supposed “best-selling writer” presents within this twenty-two page periodical.

Indeed, rather disconcertingly the persistent glimpses of the modern-day titular character alongside the New York-born writer’s enthralling 'yesteryear' plot actually frustrate the flashback's telling, especially when things turn decidedly dour for the young Pennyworth following the moustached secret agent's mission in Marrakech, Morocco, and the book's focus rudely returns to the present day as the Caped Crusader appropriates a West Motor Club rider’s motorbike in order to race after the Black and Whites. Such repeated interruptions must have increasingly annoyed some of this title’s 56,990 readers, particularly this scene which frustratingly clips the conclusion to Briar's extraction of a disease from Alfred’s veins whilst simultaneously providing his “son” with the cure; “See, the terrible thing about it is it makes you euphoric as your insides blacken. This is the antidote. It feels awful.”

Dishearteningly, such engagement with its audience is equally as unsuccessful when it comes to Batman’s confrontation with his manservant’s cigar-chomping ‘father-figure’ and his latest in a string of defeats to the Nemesis Programme’s unknown assassin. In fact, the armour-wearing Teutonic-looking killer dispatches the apparently formidable Dark Knight so effortlessly within the space of a single panel, as to make the apparently legendary crime-fighter appear utterly impotent, and hardly the sort of super-hero who these days is widely viewed by the public as “an American cultural icon.”

Unnervingly, Bruce Wayne’s alter-ego in this publication’s secondary story, “Killers-In-Law” doesn’t prove any more capable in close combat either, with writers Rafael Albuquerque and Rafael Scavone having the so-called martial arts expert get well and truly thumped by a young woman armed with nothing more than a curved blade. Admittedly, the Caped Crusader had been shot in the arm the night before and hasn’t slept since arriving in Russia, but even so it’s hard to reconcile this ineffectual costumed “clown” with someone who has previously outfought the Green Lantern, Guy Gardner…

Script: Scott Snyder, and Pencils, Inks & Cover: Rafael Albuquerque

All-Star Batman #12 - DC Comics

ALL-STAR BATMAN No. 12, September 2017

Battered, bloody, as well as badly beaten beneath the waves, Bob Kane and Bill Finger’s Batman has arguably never looked finer than in the opening act of this twenty-two page periodical as Bruce Wayne’s alter-ego relies entirely upon his brains and brawn, as opposed to insane technological gadgetry, in order to overcome what at first appears insurmountable odds. In fact Scott Snyder’s sequence depicting a grim-faced Dark Knight, knee-deep in salt water, physically attaching some tow cables to a pair of torpedoes whilst huffing and puffing with exertion must have absolutely delighted this comic’s 60,569 readers in July 2017, and momentarily made them recall just why this title was supposedly “considered the crown jewel of DC Rebirth.” 

Regrettably however, the New Yorker’s narrative soon dramatically descends into the dark depths as swiftly as Tiger Shark’s sinking submarine, once Captain Batman’s plan succeeds and the unconscious super-hero is saved from a watery grave by a quartet of mermaids. Admittedly, these aquatic females aren’t actually the mythical creatures of folklore, but rather respirator-wearing beauties hired by Gotham City’s murderous pirate to entertain his gambling guests. Yet their dramatic appearance does coincide with the American author’s preposterous plot that Alfred Pennyworth was actually himself mentored in a training programme which “was hundreds of years old” and resultantly became “a single soldier, an errant knight” for MI5…

This disappointing premise even goes so far as to suggest that the sharp-sworded Nemesis-programmed armoured knight who so readily ‘dispatched’ the titular character in the previous instalment of “The First Ally” is in reality one of the aide-de-camp’s successors. A troubling revelation with regards to the background of “Bruce Wayne's loyal and tireless butler” which is arguably only just less absurd than Snyder’s concluding shocker that Hush and the “Black And Whites” had been “in it together from the start” as part of “a ploy to get you to acquire us the [Genesis] engine, Batman.”

Disconcertingly, the back-up story to Issue Twelve of “All-Star Batman” is equally as discouraging in its depiction as to the noticeable naivety of “the world’s greatest detective” by portraying the Caped Crusader mistiming a seemingly simple ambush upon three armed guards “somewhere on the outskirts of Moscow.” Neatly written by Rafael Albuquerque and Rafael Scavone overall, this ‘short’ does however dishearteningly focus almost entirely upon the Dark Knight bungling an attempt to destroy a munitions cargo at a time when his undercover disguise as a Russian street-fighter has also been compromised.

Script: Scott Snyder, and Pencils, Inks & Cover: Rafael Albuquerque

All-Star Batman #11 - DC Comics

ALL-STAR BATMAN No. 11, August 2017

It is hard to imagine that this comic’s titular character would ever have become “an American cultural icon” or even be ranked “as number one on their list of Fifty Greatest Super Heroes In Comic Book History" by the website “FanSided” in 2015, if he was half as recklessly incompetent as Scott Snyder depicts him in Issue Eleven of “All-Star Batman”. Indeed, the vast majority of this comic’s 62,689 readers probably felt that Alfred Pennyworth had more chance of recovering the Genesis Engine from Tiger Shark’s super submarine, the Flying Dutchman, than the cowled buffoon who requires the ‘goodwill’ of his adversaries, Penguin, Black Mask and Great White, in order to endure an ocean full of man-eating crocodiles; “Alfred! Alfred, I’m in trouble here!”

Disappointingly, this second instalment to the New Yorker’s “The First Ally” story-arc isn’t even set in the Dark Knight’s early era either, when as an amateur crime-fighter he was understandably a little less competent and more reliant upon lady luck to survive than in his later days. Instead, it’s supposedly demonstrative of the Caped Crusader being at the peak of his profession, all-knowing and armed with a breath-taking array of technological gadgetry which allows him to Bat-glide through the night sky one moment, and then dive down deep beneath the waves in order to locate a “ghost ship” in the next.

Resultantly, this twenty-two page periodical's portrayal of the World's Greatest Detective badly jars with the sensibilities, especially when he is depicted being so apprehensive of three mere hoodlums that he’d rather face certain death in the sharp-toothed jaws of a pack of hungry giant reptiles, or so helpless when facing a ‘rookie’ villain that within mere moments his subscapular artery is cut open so that he’ll “only stay conscious for a matter of seconds.” Admittedly, the trio of gangsters were armed with automatic pistols, but at the time, Wayne had the higher ground, and surely would have stood far more chance fighting on dry-land than ineffectively floundering against a bask of aquatic killers?

Happily, this publication does though additionally contain more of Rafael Albuquerque and Rafael Scavone’s wonderfully-dark “Killers-In-Law” storyline too, with the secondary tale providing all the enthralling grittiness Snyder’s alleged top-tier writing lacks. Keen to “help my cover as Alexey Knockout Nokaut” by assisting Princess Vik in stealing a gift for her father’s birthday, whilst simultaneously trying not to let her kill anybody, this tale of Batman as an undercover operative is well-pencilled by Sebastian Fiumara, and contains plenty of pulse-pounding moments as the “murderous heiress” increasingly smells a rat within her criminal organisation.

Script: Scott Snyder, and Pencils, Inks & Cover: Rafael Albuquerque

All-Star Batman #10 - DC Comics

ALL-STAR BATMAN No. 10, July 2017

This particular twenty-two page periodical is arguably a good example of Scott Snyder’s creative writing at both its best and worse. For whilst the New Yorker ultimately pens a somewhat engaging tale of modern-day pirates and swashbuckling shenanigans, such as when Bruce Wayne uses “a painting done on the broadside of Blackbeard’s ship” as a shield against automatic-weapon fire, the American author does so by providing as little exposition as possible to explain what caused this situation to arise in the first place.

Indeed, it's hard to imagine just how any reader who hasn’t encountered Paul Dini's “Heart of Hush” story-line (“Detective Comics #846–850) is supposed to understand why Hush is both sporting the billionaire industrialist’s face, and apparently has the criminal underworld clout to financially afford something as dangerous as the Genesis Engine? Or, for that matter, how the heavily-bandaged super-villain even comes to be in Miami, racing towards its football stadium in a helicopter whilst being pursued by an Alfred Pennyworth-driven Batmobile?; “Haha! Look at him! Take him out of Gotham and Batman drives like an old man!” 

Fortunately for this publication’s 66,018-strong audience however, such frustrating omissions are eventually forgivable once the Dark Knight lands at Fort Dexter and starts tangling with “a descendant of the most infamous Florida pirate, Edward Thatch…” Admittedly, this “pirate adventure” is pretty short-lived, and concludes in a shocking moment of mutilation, but it does allow the Eagle Award-nominee to pull off an especially enjoyable surprise as to the identity of the adolescent who is occasionally depicted outrunning a band of British blue-uniformed Bobbies pursuing him across the rooftops of London.

Quite possibly the greatest feature to Issue Ten of “All-Star Batman” though is its secondary narrative, “Killers-In-Law” by Rafael Albuquerque and Rafael Scavone. Dynamically-drawn by Sebastian Fiumara and atmospherically-lit by Trish Mulvihill’s colours, this ‘short’ begins the gripping tale of Wayne going undercover as a cold-hearted ‘pit-fighter’ in order to destroy a shipment of weapons supplied by “the most dangerous group in the Russian Mafia”, and is packed full of gritty pugilism and an all-pervading threat that he’s not going “pass as Alexey long enough to stay alive.”

Script: Scott Snyder, and Pencils, Inks & Cover: Rafael Albuquerque

All-Star Batman #9 - DC Comics

ALL-STAR BATMAN No. 9, June 2017

Scott Snyder’s “Finale” to his “Ends Of The Earth” story-arc must surely have come as a bitterly disappointing blow to the 67,632 followers who made this title the twelfth best-selling comic book in April 2017. Indeed, with the notable exception of an appearance by “one of Batman's most enduring enemies”, Ra's al Ghul, there’s arguably very little within the New Yorker’s twenty-two page script which either entertains or even actually makes any sense whatsoever.

For starters, having hitherto (mis)treated his audience to some tantalisingly brief encounters with some of the Dark Knight’s more notorious nemeses - Mister Freeze, Poison Ivy and the Mad Hatter, this particular plot disconcertingly leaps forward in time to a point where the Caped Crusader is already being hotly pursued by a handful of helicopters as he races towards Washington Monument, and is riding a motorbike which has previously had its G.P.S. and weapon systems ‘blown out’. Admittedly, such a story-telling technique hurls the reader straight into the action without giving them time to even breathe, but rather lazily also allows the American author to omit any explanations as to just why “in nineteen minutes, the Blackhawks put a bullet in Duke’s head if we can’t get to that tower.” There's not even a hint as to how the “Demon’s Head” ever managed to commission “tech developed for the Blackhawks… to get Freeze into that [Alaskan] facility” or how the son of Sensei later “laced the incendiary bombs with Ivy’s research” so as to make his deadly spores extra virulent..?

Instead, the Stan Lee Award-winner simply appears to hope that as such a complicated chain of events purportedly makes perfect sense to Batman, his writing’s patrons will just meekly accept them as fact and get on trying to digest the rest of his incomprehensible penmanship. It’s certainly hard to understand how else the reader would ever be expected to guess that the caped figure initially seen being blown off their motorised 'bat-ride', is actually Selina Kyle using digitally-enhanced camouflage “technology to mask her[self]” whilst Bruce Wayne makes his way unseen to the criminal mastermind’s location; “All to draw my men away, eh? You’ve always been an illusionist.”

Disagreeably, this comic’s artwork only seems to add to the senselessness of Snyder’s script, with Mark Simpson’s scratchily drawn figures providing yet another hurdle to the adventure’s accessibility. In fact, if Ra’s Al Ghul didn’t publically announce himself towards the beginning of this comic, it would potentially never be clear just who the brains behind the Dark Knight’s predicament was, and that’s despite Jock pencilling the League of Assassins’ leader facially full on before the tale is even a quarter of the way through its telling…

The regular cover art of "ALL-STAR BATMAN" No. 9 by Mark "Jock" Simpson

All-Star Batman #8 - DC Comics

ALL-STAR BATMAN No. 8, May 2017

It must have undoubtedly been clear to those loyal 71,809 readers that bought Issue Eight of “All-Star Batman” that Scott Snyder clearly had some far-reaching and broad-canvassed narrative in his mind when he was composing this third instalment to “Ends Of The Earth”. For whilst the twenty-two page periodical almost exclusively focuses upon the Dark Knight’s infiltration of the Mad Hatter’s mansion, located near the “Mississippi Delta... Twenty miles deep in the Batchaloo Swamp”, it continues to pursue the New York-born writer’s plot of Victor Fries releasing a “necrotic patch” spore into the atmosphere and Doctor Pamela Isley subsequently helping the Caped Crusader develop a cure with which to halt the murderous fungi.

Sadly however, in order to do this, the American author relies upon a series of explanatory panels that not only provide a bit of necessary backstory to the titular character’s motivations, but disconcertingly, also start to summarise events within the story-arc which this publication has never actually ever depicted. These ‘narrative leaps’, such as Duke's dutiful deployment to watch the “death patch” and subsequent sudden silence “one hour ago, or the stealthy assailants which have been supposedly “hounding” Batman “every step of the way”, being revealed as the Blackhawks, “a long-vanished strike force known to take down apocalyptic threats”, awkwardly jar with the general flow of the adventure, and resultantly come across as simply lazy penmanship on behalf of the Stan Lee Award-winner.

Fortunately, not everything is amiss with Snyder’s suggestion that Bruce Wayne has been living a chemically-influence hallucination ever since he first encountered Jarvis Tetch back when the mind-controlling scientist tried to sell the billionaire “a hat that would interact with the wearer’s neurology”. The appearance of (fake) Batwoman, Nightwing and Red Hood, and their beating at the hands of their cloaked mentor is arguably worth the cover price of the comic alone, especially seeing as it concludes with a bizarre Giuseppi Camuncoli-pencilled illustration depicting the cowled crime-fighter about to battle a flock of robotic bright pink flamingos…

Yet even witnessing the Dark Knight dispatch an assailant by thwacking him around the head with a squawking feathered fowl, isn’t enough to save a script which dwells far too long upon the protagonist pondering as to whether to press a detonator switch or not, rather than telling a well-paced thoughtful tale. Indeed, Snyder would arguably have been far more successful if he had simply curtailed Batman’s disconcerting visions of his Rogue Gallery clawing at his exposed brain, and not then had to rely upon the book’s Italian artist to rather clumsily compile this comic's cataclysmic conclusion within the space of ten tiny panels.

The regular cover art of "ALL-STAR BATMAN" No. 8 by Giuseppi Camuncoli & Dean White

All-Star Batman #7 - DC Comics

ALL-STAR BATMAN No. 7, April 2017

In many ways it is hard to comprehend that Issue Seven of “All-Star Batman” was the seventh best-selling comic book in February 2017 by shifting an incredible 77,096 copies, as Scott Snyder’s plot for this particular instalment of “Ends Of The Earth” is painfully thin in places. True, the twenty-two page periodical does contain a rather enjoyable team-up between the titular character and Poison Ivy, by pitting the ‘odd couple’ up against a kill squad of quantum stealth suit-wearing armed assassins. But this momentary madness doesn’t last anywhere near long enough, and is rather disappointingly brought to an all-too swift end by the Dark Knight easily punching all their assailants’ lights out; “Pamela… Stay behind me!” 

To be honest though, this publication’s problems start before the first panel has even finished, by depicting the Caped Crusader grimly strolling across the heated landscape of Death Valley on the Nevada Border. Such a predicament seems a million miles away from this series’ previous edition, which ended on a chillingly cold cliff-hanger in Alaska, and gives no clue whatsoever as to how Bruce Wayne’s alter-ego escaped the freezing ‘cryogenic-coffin’ he had been sharing with Mister Freeze, or the self-inflicted microbial virus his body carried, or the imminent airborne missile strike for that matter either.?

Instead, Snyder’s writing presents a desperate Batman tracking the eco-terrorist down to her annual ‘research hideaway’ in the hope that, despite his habitual lying to her as to whether an infected fourteen-year old girl is alive or dead, she will be able to provide an antidote to “an ancient bacteria” which “Freeze let loose.” Such a blatant disregard as to what has immediately occurred before is so antagonistically jarring, that it arguably creates a real barrier between the bibliophile and the ensuing storyline straight from the outset, and must surely have also had many readers reaching back in their comic book collection to check whether they had erroneously missed an issue or something. 

Equally as off-putting is Tula Lotay’s “pencils, inks and colors”, which whilst perfectly competent enough to visualise the New Yorker’s narrative, disappointingly fails to bring any of the cast vividly to life. Indeed, the English illustrator’s dubious decision to provide the Dark Knight with a green neon bat-suit, Poison Ivy with tree-funk eye make-up and luminescent vegetation vines, as well as combat troopers with vision-blurring invisibility kits, soon become just the beginning of this magazine’s artistic woes.

The regular cover art of "ALL-STAR BATMAN" No. 7 by Tula Lotay

All-Star Batman #6 - DC Comics

ALL-STAR BATMAN No. 6, March 2017

As a concept, the idea of Mister Freeze waking up “nearly five hundred people around the nation [currently] sleeping in ice, held in cryogenic stasis” and eradicating all other life through the release of a millennia-old deadly bacteria, is a pretty solid one. Unfortunately for this comic’s 84,296 buyers however, Scott Snyder’s decision to step away from the (tried and tested) traditional storytelling technique to one where the tale is told through the words of a narrator, is disastrously detrimental and arguably acts as a significant barrier to any enjoyment “DC Comics” presumably hoped to bring by publishing this adventure.

Admittedly, not everything is wrong with the Harvey Award-winner’s writing. For example, he wonderfully tricks the reader at the start of “Ends Of The Earth” by fooling them into believing it was a young Bruce Wayne who “had to memorize a poem for a school assignment” when it was actually Victor Fries. Yet such bookish cleverness isn’t enough to tie down any perusing bibliophile with the rest of the dialogueless drivel the New York author has on offer within this twenty-three page periodical, especially when the former cryogenics expert’s plan is supposedly thwarted by the titular lead having earlier infected himself with a virus which “hidden… in his body, his blood” would “when his skin was exposed… become airborne…”

Just as off-putting as the narration style though has to be Mark Simpson’s disconcerting and oft-times somewhat confusing artwork. There’s a lot to admire in Jock’s early frames as the Batman stoically stalks through an Alaskan blizzard, some “three hundred miles north of the Arctic Circle”. Whilst the Scots-born illustrator’s renderings of Freeze’s carbon-bonded ice zombies are as chillingly well-conceived as the biologically tough creatures are apparently immune to the effects of batarangs. But as soon as the action abates, and Nora’s husband settles down to the sedentary telling of “over fifty years worth of dreamers, all hoping to be woken up one day to a better world”, the scratchy drawing style starts to appear wooden, angular and downright unattractive.

Sadly, there’s little to like with this magazine’s secondary story, “The Cursed Wheel” either, despite Snyder’s attempt to throw his audience straight into the action by having Batman and Duke facing one of the Riddler’s explosive conundrums right from the opening splash-page. Featuring the typically colourful and characterful visuals of Francesco Francavilla, this short-lived crossword game using an apartment block and its aghast occupants makes little sense whatsoever due to its rushed pace and inaccessible over-reliance upon its fanbase having previously read up on Thomas’ journey as the Dark Knight’s latest side-kick; “You need to be patient. You’re doing great work, but you’re only half-way through the wheel."

Script: Scott Snyder, Artist: Jock, and Colors: Matt Hollingsworth

All-Star Batman #5 - DC Comics

ALL-STAR BATMAN No. 5, February 2017

Sadly, it is easy to see just why this title’s readership continued to fall during the “My Own Worst Enemy” story-arc. True, Issue Five of “All-Star Batman” still managed to sell a formidable 87,422 copies in December 2016, and brings the Dark Knight’s 498 mile-long road trip with Two-Face to something of a conclusion. But Scott Snyder’s narrative remarkably achieves all this without making much sense whatsoever, and arguably raises infinitely more questions as to the elongated storyline’s plot than a finale ever should.

For starters, it is never satisfactorily explained just why the titular character decided he had to literally transport Harvey Dent with him to their old boarding school? Why couldn’t the Caped Crusader simply take the ‘Batwing’ alone to the hiding place of the gangster’s mysterious cure, and bring the concoction which “works on the Meoa, on Oxytocin… on the chemistry that makes us compassionate or selfish” back with him? Apart from it providing the comic’s Stan Lee Award-winner with a contrived premise for his five-parter, as well as giving the American author an opportunity to suggest an unruly infant Bruce Wayne once roomed with the former District Attorney in a residence for troubled youngsters, the decision makes little logical sense.

In addition, what could possibly have possessed a young Alfred Pennyworth to approach someone to kill the Joker and fund the murder using monies “we’d allocated for the [Bat]cave.” Such a betrayal of everything the morally-high "surrogate father figure" stands for is simply unfathomable, and yet to make matters worse, Snyder then adds insult to injury by having the butler confess over the phone that he actually sabotaged the Batplane in order to convince his master to turn back from his current adventure; “I am a hypocrite. But know that at every stage, I was trying to save you.” 

Quite possibly this thirty-one page periodical’s only saving grace, apart from some outstandingly dynamic artwork by John Romita Junior, is the continuously threatening presence of supervillain KGBeast. Homicidal and insane, the heavily armed killer dominates every scene within which he appears, whether it be gunning down ‘innocents’ from the deck of a steamboat or skewering Batman through the shoulder with a metal spike, and as a result frustratingly seems to be the only member of this comic’s cast who captures both the imagination and interest...

The regular cover art of "ALL-STAR BATMAN" No. 5 by John Romita Junior

All-Star Batman #4 - DC Comics

ALL-STAR BATMAN No. 4, January 2017

Whilst one of Batman’s most readily recognisable strengths has always been his “science and technology”, Scott Snyder’s script for Issue Four of “All-Star Batman” disconcertingly ramps up the Dark Knight’s arsenal of gadgetry to an arguably preposterous high, by portraying the Bat-suit as having both the ability to fire numerous projectiles from its chest plate and gloves, as well as provide its disorientated wearer with pectoral speakers and “Echolocation.” In fact, what with the cowl’s ability to suddenly extend a supposedly air-tight guard over Bruce Wayne’s lower face, and ‘blast’ the Caped Crusader’s opponents with a forward-facing sound wave, the Harvey Award-winner’s interpretation of the super-hero’s costume seems far more akin to something Tony Stark would wear within a “Marvel Worldwide” publication, rather than the “grey body suit” created by Bill Finger and Bob Kane.

Rather disconcertingly however, such a plethora of exoskeleton augmentations, even when imagined by the New York-writer himself, are still not enough apparently to save the titular character from being blinded, when it purportedly helps provide the plot with an extra twist. This utter contrivance, based on the assumption that despite being housed within an armoured, air-tight head-piece, Batman’s eyes would still be ruined by the vapours from a vial of Two-Face’s burning acid, is only ‘topped’ by the utter absurdity of the crime-fighter’s solution to his dilemma… piloting a bi-plane in order to give his sight time to recover..?

Equally as implausible as its start, is the conclusion to “My Own Worst Enemy”, with Snyder building upon the premise that the Court of Owls gave Harvey Dent “my own battalion” of assassins, by subsequently having the former Gotham City district attorney apparently able to additionally marshal a thousand-strong armed mob, courtesy of a tracker code on his mobile phone; “Come on you piece of -- therrrre we go. One bar… two bars…” Admittedly this people-packed cliff-hanger gives artist John Romita Jr. plenty of opportunity to pencil a vast array of formidable-looking miscreants and malcontents, but such a fortuitously well-timed arrival seems as realistically likely as the mob’s incredibly lucky ability to shoot the Silver Dollar casino boat into matchwood and yet still miss their targets Batman and Duke.

The regular cover art of "ALL-STAR BATMAN" No. 4 by John Romita Junior

All-Star Batman #3 - DC Comics

ALL-STAR BATMAN No. 3, December 2016

Featuring a genuinely vicious battle between the titular character and KGBeast, this thirty-page periodical must have genuinely assaulted the senses of its 106,905 strong audience, at least for its opening third. For whilst Anatoli Knyazev’s scintillatingly savage attack upon Bruce Wayne’s alter-ego rather enthusiastically seems to produce more blood than even the two large-sized combatants could realistically carry inside them, Scott Snyder’s script does sadly start to fizzle out just as soon as Duke arrives to rescue the Caped Crusader and transport him to a secret medical centre hidden beneath a walnut farm.

Indeed, in many ways “My Own Worst Enemy” is ‘a game of two halves’, with the Dark Knight’s initial fisticuffs against the trained Russian assassin utterly eclipsing the rather dialogue-heavy later introduction of genius inventor Harold Allnut, and Batman’s bizarre recollection as to how, as a rebellious child, Alfred Pennyworth sent him to an upstate home for “struggling children” in Innsmouth, where he would first meet Harvey Dent… Certainly, the magazine never seems able to match its opening pulse-pounding pace once Knyazev has unceremoniously dispatched the entire Royal Flush Gang (“aka: Mess”) with a micro-bomb, and shakily stomped back to his pick-up truck.

Sadly, John Romita Junior’s breakdowns for this comic somewhat similarly become ‘flawed’ once the Beast’s mercenarily murderous machinations have been brought to an ignoble end, with the Inkpot Award-winner’s pencilling of a badly bruised Bruce and hot-headed Duke lacking many of the artist’s characteristic techniques, such as numerous hatchings and rather rectangular physiques. In fact, it isn’t until Batman and his “good ally” are travelling “up the pipeline” in the ‘Bat-Hovercraft’ that the New Yorker’s illustrations once again seem to carry a life of their own.

Regrettably, there is also little enjoyment to be found within this book’s secondary story “The Cursed Wheel” either, despite the tale following Duke Thomas’ investigation into the serial killer Victor Zsasz. Woefully drawn by Declan Shalvey, whose panels predominantly resemble those found inside an amateur fanzine rather than a genuine “DC Comics” publication, this short’s script is disconcertingly based upon the premise that the supervillain who “carves a tally mark somewhere on himself for every victim” would obligingly allow “baby bird” to live despite having catastrophically caught him unawares at the end of the adventure’s previous instalment...

The variant cover art of "ALL-STAR BATMAN" No. 3 by Declan Shalvey

All-Star Batman #2 - DC Comics

ALL-STAR BATMAN No. 2, November 2016

The second best-selling title of September 2016, at least according to “Diamond Comic Distributors”, Issue Two of “All-Star Batman” must have driven its 137,748 readers into a frothing frenzy with its over-the-top thrill-a-minute narrative that essentially takes “a wrecking ball to Batman’s world”. True, the titular character’s “train ride from hell” alongside Harvey Dent has the Caped Crusader matching muscles with Killer Croc, King Shark and Amygdala all within the space of just a couple of pages. But Scott Snyder doesn’t seem even remotely interested in explaining just how the three seemingly unstoppable heavily-muscled monstrosities, at least one of which has a “devolved human brain”, came to catch the Dark Knight by surprise on top of a freight train… 

Indeed, the New York-born writer, and indisputably in-form John Romita Junior, don’t even appear overly-eager to justify just why Bruce Wayne’s alter-ego is riding aboard the timber-laden locomotive in the first place. They certainly don’t bother clarifying where within their “assassin-infested landscape” poison experts Cheshire and Copperhead, or Anatoli Knyazev a.k.a. the Beast, miraculously appear from, nor how the already groggy super-hero seemingly just shrugs off a toxic crossbow bolt perforating his guts; “I’ll admit, Bats, you made it farther than I expected. But now you got what? Maybe one minute before you go belly up? I warned you about betting against me.”

By far the most disconcerting plot development however, is Jim Gordon and Harvey Bullock’s storming of Wayne Manor alongside a horde of Gotham City’s finest, and their subsequent determined demolition of “the clock in study” in order to breach the entrance to the Batcave. This genuinely troubling sequence, which depicts Alfred Pennyworth being casually cast aside by the police as “Batman’s closest ally… until tonight” supposedly “break[s] under [the] pressure of Two-Face’s blackmail” and attempts to arrest Bruce for being the Dark Knight, is undeniably dramatic. Yet additionally seems to completely rewrite the Commissioner’s long-standing relationship with his jurisdiction’s foremost masked vigilante and unwavering sense of honesty. 

Equally as perplexing is Snyder’s script for this publication’s secondary story “The Cursed Wheel”. Rather disappointingly pencilled (and inked) by Declan Shalvey, who somehow manages to make even the Caped Crusader’s silhouette appear unconvincingly wooden, this seven-page tale depicts a rather incautious cowled crime-fighter leaving his latest protégé, Duke, to the tender mercies of Victor Zsasz in the basement of the serial killer’s latest victim.

The regular cover art of "ALL-STAR BATMAN" No. 2 by John Romita Junior

All-Star Batman #1 - DC Comics

ALL-STAR BATMAN No. 1, October 2016

Supposedly inspired by a road trip across the Southwest with his nine-year-old, this “first arc” of “All-Star Batman” by Scott Snyder is arguably far closer to being an unmitigated confusing mess of “in continuity” causality than “a no-holds-barred journey” which takes Batman and Two-Face on a “high-octane, high-stakes” adventure across the state. Indeed, the vast majority of its audience must have been shaking their heads in utter bemusement as the twenty-four page periodical’s wonderfully dramatic opening sequence suddenly lurches back in time to “twenty two minutes ago”, then “two hours ago”, then “two weeks ago”, and then “twenty minutes ago” etc etc… It certainly soon becomes difficult to chronologically work out just which version of the Caped Crusader the action is following, and why he’s planning on travelling nearly five hundred miles north with Harvey Dent in the Batwing.

Fortunately the New York-born writer does at least live up to his post-publication promise of incorporating plenty of “villains I’ve never used” before into the “thrill-a-minute” action, with both Firefly and Killer Moth making an impressive entrance, courtesy of manhandling the Dark Knight straight through the interior of a prefabricated fast food restaurant. Unhappily, the same cannot be said for Black Spider, a multiple mechanically-armed hired gun who perhaps somewhat contrivingly confronts a chainsaw-wielding Batman in the middle of a wheat field; “But know that I’ve got some upgrades since we last met, Batman. Every tarsus on these legs is semi-automatic. Bottom line: You’re outgunned seven to one.”

Perhaps this book’s greatest enticement however, is the excellent artwork of one “of the best in the business”, John Romita Junior. Moodily sketched with plenty of well-defined shadows, and similar in style to his pencilling on the “gritty street-level stories of… Spider-Man and Daredevil”, even the American illustrator’s more sedentary sequences, such as Batman and a golden-armoured Duke Thomas talking to Commissioner Gordon after an acid rain storm, forces the eye to linger on the intricate detail of every panel… Whilst the tense, restrained yet dynamically nervous motion the Inkpot Award-winner imbues his figures with when the armed customers of Auggie Mac’s Diner encircle Batman in an effort to stop him capturing Two-Face, makes the shock of the titular character being suddenly shot in the back all the more impactive.

Flawed as the script to “My Own Worst Enemy” is though, Snyder’s penmanship for this comic’s secondary tale, which vaguely starts recounting Duke Thomas’ introduction to “a condensed version of all” Batman’s training, is arguably even worse, with Declan Shalvey’s woefully wooden one-dimensional drawings looking especially poor as a result of directly following on from “JRJR”. In fact Editor Mark Doyle may well have thought with hindsight that the $4.99 publication was probably a superior quality product without including “The Cursed Wheel”, and that the book’s Irish artist would have been put to better use simply pencilling additional variant covers…

The regular cover art of "ALL-STAR BATMAN" No. 1 by John Romita Junior