King-Size Conan #1 [Part One] - Marvel Comics

KING-SIZE CONAN No. 1, December 2020

Described by “Marvel Worldwide” as an oversized “special spanning the breadth of Conan’s life and times by the most dazzling array of creative talent ever assembled to tread the jewelled thrones of the Earth”, this celebratory comic probably still fell a little short of its readers’ expectations when it hit the spinner-racks in December 2020. Indeed, by limiting itself to escapades which are nestled hard up against some of Robert E. Howard’s most famous literary adventures, the concept behind such an anthology had arguably already infuriatingly hamstrung its numerous authors to provide its sword and sorcery fans with anything resembling an exciting adventure, before they had so much as put pen to paper.

For starters, the “can’t-miss Conan comic of the decade” begins with a ten-page long plot which leads directly into the first ever issue of the Cimmerian’s exploits, “originally published precisely half a century ago.” Described by Roy Thomas as being “more a vignette than a story” the yarn admittedly does a fair job explaining just why the inexperienced barbarian originally decided to visit a few of the world’s corners following his involvement in the infamous Battle of Venarium, as well as rationalising the youth’s somewhat bizarre choice in adornments and armament; “The [horned] helmet was my far-wandering grandsire’s. And Rion -- was like a big brother to me.” However, despite artist Steve McNiven dynamically pencilling Conan subsequently walking smack into a Vanir ambush en route to see the blond-haired people’s leader Olav, the truncated plot ends very abruptly with the bloody skirmish having only just started and the antagonist literally about to properly whet his blade.

Perhaps therefore far more satisfying is Kurt Busiek’s “In The City Of Thieves”, which very much acts as a precursor to Howard’s highly popular 1933 classic fable “The Tower Of The Elephant” by having the young Cimmerian disappointingly sit out an opportunity to encounter an aspiring wizard’s pet demons during his time in Zamora. Unwilling to take up a well-paid offer to guard the fledgling magic user whilst the student conjures up a chittering cloud of lethal sprites, the Boston-born writer instead has our titular hero arrive far too late to save the day, and rather disappointingly just depicts him looting the hapless deceased of their treasure before skulking off to investigate the rumours surrounding Yara’s mysterious citadel.

The original cover art of "KING-SIZE CONAN" #1 by Andrew C. Robinson