Batman #23 [The New 52] - DC Comics

BATMAN No. 23, October 2013

First published way back in the November 1939 “Detective Comics” adventure “The Batman Wars Against The Dirigible Of Doom”, the origin of the Dark Knight is forever linked within the minds of serious comic book collectors everywhere with a simple two-page flashback sequence that ends with the billionaire uttering the immortal words “Criminals are a superstitious cowardly lot. So my disguise must be able to strike terror into their hearts. I must be a creature of the night, black, terrible… a… a… a bat!”

Some seventy-five years later, Issue Twenty Three of “Batman” sacrilegiously attempts to alter that Golden Age magic by allowing Scott Snyder to irreverently rewrite such a momentous moment in his “most ambitious and definitely… boldest” narrative yet… And whilst admittedly the sentiment of ‘a huge bat flying through his open window’ remains as the Caped Crusader’s legendary inspiration, everything else in the New Yorker’s new “secret history of Bruce Wayne’s transformation into Batman” is disappointingly different.

To begin with, considering the savagely murderous beating Gotham City’s most eligible bachelor receives at the very beginning of “Secret City: Part Three”, it is unbelievably miraculous that the young vigilante is actually even alive to witness the “omen” of a flying rodent. For within the space of a handful of pages Wayne is blown up, mercilessly battered by a mace, repeatedly ‘chopped’ by an axe, punched numerous times and finally shot twice by the Red Hood and his gang. Yet despite such fearful injuries, breaks, bruising and considerable blood loss, the (future) industrialist still somehow manages to walk all the way back from his residential flat to Wayne Manor and get patched up by a “rusty” Alfred Pennyworth. ‘True grit’ indeed, and a far cry from Bill Finger’s version of a comfortable-looking philanthropist sat surrounded by his family’s wealth, pondering what disguise he should adopt.

However 'the worst is yet to come' as Snyder purportedly ‘respectfully redefines’ the moment Batman is born by having the heavily stitched socialite find his muse not in a chiropteran inadvertently straying into his home but by accidentally activating his long-dead father’s visual mapper of the cave system beneath the mansion. Such a heavily padded scene, no less than five pages in length, doesn’t even contain any defining dialogue unless the American author plans on having the World’s Greatest Detective forever associated with the readily forgettable lines “Yes. I See.” Such an incredibly dire and substandard re-imagining of so iconic a scene makes it easy to believe Snyder's open admission that he lives “with too much anxiety and terror of getting kicked off Batman all the time”.

Tragically not even James Tynion IV’s collaborative five-page short story “The Pit” has much in the way of comfort to offer any aghast readers of this comic book. For whilst the basic plot of a twenty-four year-old Bruce Wayne refusing to kill his opponents in a Norwegian “death match” fighting-pit makes perfect sense. The fact the tale picks up after he’s supposedly been battling multiple foes for “twenty-eight hours straight” is ludicrously unrealistic. Only superseded in silliness by the magazine’s final page… a bizarre advertisement by “DC Comics” for an expanded Batman Universe featuring “The Return Of The Bat-Cow!”

The variant cover art of "BATMAN" No. 23 by Gary Frank

Joe Frankenstein #4 - IDW Publishing

JOE FRANKENSTEIN No. 4, May 2015

Anyone buying this final instalment of the “Joe Frankenstein” mini-series will soon realise why the comic book’s creators’ post-publication announcement that “there will be more to come” was so apt. For whilst this lengthy twenty-seven page fright-fest sees the machinations of “The Mistress” finally come to a rather fitting end, literally at the hands of the equally evil Lord Golgatha, co-writer Chuck Nixon’s narrative hardly provides the most satisfactory of conclusions.

Indeed it is hard to imagine another story ending with quite so many unresolved plot threads as within this magazine’s final few pages the mysterious vampiric “Master” successfully retrieves “the blood of the monster” for some undisclosed purpose, Joe embarks upon a quest to find the one with “the power of life and death” in order to resurrect his dead beloved Skye, and the villainous Saxton boards an aeroplane carrying the “human remains” of Frankenstein’s Bride presumably intent on somehow restoring her ashes back to life.

Fortunately however, such an annoying shortcoming is easily overlooked as a result of the numerous funny fast-paced tongue-in-cheek shenanigans which populate the rest of this publication. The witty banter between the orphaned teenager and diminutive Enoch is extremely amusing and instances such as when the pizza delivery boy ‘buys the duo a few seconds’ by throwing a handful of back-pocket change at the pointy-eared fiends because “legacy bloodsuckers are obsessive counters…” provides Graham Nolan an endearing opportunity to really tap into his source material concerning the weaknesses of vampires. Finnabar the werewolf chauffeur is similarly entertaining throughout as he claws his way past the Bride’s human guards in accordance with his fellow employee’s wolf-whistles; “Sic ‘em Finnabar! And start with this guy!” 

Sadly despite such an energetic and ‘lively’ storyline Nolan’s artwork appears to be simply competent at best and at times actually appears to be rather rushed. Such disappointing pencils are especially evident towards the end of the comic when all attention finally refocus’ upon the precarious predicament of Frankenstein’s Monster. Admittedly the ‘modern Prometheus’ is significantly weakened as a result of having several large phials of blood drained out of him. But that doesn’t necessarily explain why the American artist suddenly depicts the muscular brute as little more than an overly scrawny giant. Especially after Enoch gives the creature a massive electrical “pick-me-up.”

The regular cover art of "JOE FRANKENSTEIN" No. 4 by Graham Nolan

Tomb Of Dracula #18 - Marvel Comics

TOMB OF DRACULA No. 18, March 1974

Whilst Marv Wolfman’s narrative for “Enter: Werewolf By Night” undoubtedly makes good upon its promise of celebrating “two of Marvel’s most macabre super-stars-- in a battle of monsters!” The Brooklyn-born writer’s confrontation is rather disappointingly an emphatically one-sided affair as the Prince of Vampires easily subdues his lycanthrope opponent on two entirely separate occasions. Indeed Dracula actually appears to have more of a problem overcoming Jacob “Jack” Russell’s mysteriously mesmerising female companion Topaz, than he does outfighting the antiheroic werewolf, even turning “hesitantly before the power of this girl” and taking flight into “the indigo skies.”

However any readers dissatisfied over so lack-lustre a response to this meeting of two iconic horror comic book characters, should still have found plenty to enjoy within the Shazam Award-winner’s storyline, especially as it provides plenty of cryptic clues as to why Russell’s father had apparently been secretly “observing” Castle Dracula from a clandestine vantage point within Russoff Manor. This particular periodical also contains some additional backstory to Bram Stoker’s creation as well. Something which is especially useful for those unfamiliar with the vampire’s history as depicted in the American black and white horror magazine “Dracula Lives!”; a thirteen issue series published by “Marvel Comics Group” in the early Seventies.  

In fact Wolfman seems to positively delight in teasing his audience with cryptic clues as to future tragedies yet to come and even goes so far as to include a brief fleeting glimpse of a hapless Blade about to be staked by a chair bound Quincy Harker beneath the streets of Paris, only to then narrate “but we shall not see its impact…” Yet whilst the vampire killer’s fate at the hands of the elderly invalid is clearly to be revealed in “the next issue” dishearteningly readers would have to go and purchase Issue Fifteen of “Werewolf By Night” in order to “learn the origin of the werewolf” as well as discover “the conclusion of the most sense-shattering battle of them all.” For as Dracula kneels over a semi-conscious Russell saying “But for now, Dracula thirsts and he thirsts [for] the blood of the werewolf!” the comic dramatically ends.

Equally as frustrating is the artwork of Eugene Jules “Gene” Colan, whose pencilling appears worryingly inconsistent throughout this issue despite being inked by Tom Palmer. The two-time Eagle Award-winner seems to initially really struggle drawing Jack Russell and it is only when the New Yorker portrays the cursed youth battling the drunken ne’er-do-well Scratcher that his readily recognised charismatic style comes to the fore.

Writer: Marv Wolfman, Artist: Gene Colan, and Inker: Tom Palmer

Batman #22 [The New 52] - DC Comics

BATMAN No. 22, September 2013

Writer Scott Snyder was undoubtedly correct when he described his “secret history of Bruce Wayne’s transformation into Batman” as being something new, “different” and “unexpected”. For in his desperation to try and avoid a simple retelling of Frank Miller’s 1987 stellar origin story “Batman: Year One”, the New Yorker has created the most arrogant, petty and dislikeable incarnation of the Billionaire arguably to see print.

Whether physically taking his frustrations out on his noble butler, Alfred, when his latest attempt to entrap the mysterious Red Hood goes awry or petulantly storming away from a surprise “Welcome Home Bruce” celebration organised by his Uncle Philip, the youthful budding crimefighter demonstrates none of the Dark Knight’s famous strengths and admirable qualities… But instead seems to simply be a self-centred, bullish, arrogant oaf who seemingly believes that everyone else, including Pennyworth, is wrong whilst he is irrefutably right.

As a result there is very little to the vigilante’s plight in “Secret City: Part Two” which generates any sort of sympathy in the reader, even when his uncle’s advisor, Edward Nygma, reveals to him that his father’s brother is actually supplying killers and terrorists with Wayne Technology-based weapons and a guilt-ridden Bruce phones his trusty elderly manservant saying “Please pick up. I was wrong, Alfred”.

Yet despite this apathy towards the contemptible titular character and his inadequate amateurish attempts to bring down the bad guy, Issue Twenty Two of “Batman” still somehow managed to be the second biggest-selling comic book of July 2013, shifting a whopping 132,047 copies. Though much of this success is almost certainly due to the wonderfully zany yet sinisterly serious machinations of the narrative’s central villain, the charmingly evil Red Hood. Indeed so disagreeable and obnoxious is Wayne’s behaviour within this instalment’s twenty-three pages that it is hard not to actually start rooting for the criminal mastermind, especially when he matter-of-factly kills one of his own men in order to humorously create “an opening right now” for “our little vigilante”.

Far more entertaining is Snyder’s short story “The One Time”, co-written with regular collaborator James Tynion IV. This brief tale, quite delightfully drawn by Rafael Albuquerque, shows a haughty and overconfident twenty-one year-old Bruce Wayne being taught a stern lesson in his over-reliance upon technology.

The variant cover art of "BATMAN" No. 22 by Mikel Janin

Zombies Vs. Robots #6 - IDW Publishing

ZOMBIES VS. ROBOTS No. 6, June 2015

If any casual purveyor of comic books were to simply read this magazine’s back page blurb and buy Issue Six of “Zombies Verses Robots” blind, then they would undoubtedly be mightily disappointed. For whilst “IDW Publishing” promises “rotting zombies, invaders from the Moon” and “an all-out robot brawl of explosive proportions”, in reality this anthology offers little in the way of exciting entertainment except perhaps the very sad demise of Bot-Bot.

Admittedly “Inherit The Earth” starts out well enough, with co-creator Chris Ryall hurling his “surviving astronauts” up against a seemingly unending horde of brain-hungry ghouls “on an island that used to house Amazons”. In fact until the unexplained arrival of the automaton Virus and dramatic demise of Zeb, the eleven-pager provides plenty of frantic fast-paced action and laughs a plenty; especially when the cosmonauts use the reeking head of a zombified Minotaur to impale several of the rancid undead. But sadly the writing soon takes a turn for the worse as the “lightning-bot” somehow manages to instantly electrocute all the living corpses emanating from “the Mermen’s undersea base”, before being itself impotently “absorbed and dispersed” by Winterbottom the Warbot.

Perhaps as equally uninspired by the script as the title’s declining readership, Anthony Diecidue’s artwork dramatically varies from the humorously fun and detailed, to the childlike and inept. For one moment his highly stylised cartoon-like pencilling poignantly portrays the burial of Cesar and Zeb, and in the next purportedly presents an all-action firefight using stick men and vague inanimate shapes…

Equally as disappointing is Ashley Wood’s “Tales Of ZVR”. This double splash-page short story is as confusingly drawn by the Australian illustrator as it is badly-written and depicts the ever-questing boy with the small ‘bot encountering a rather overbearing foul-mouthed young woman. The Spectrum Award-winning art director is 'clearly' a 'talented' painter. But discouragingly none of that artistic ability is especially evident with this ‘minisode’.

Arguably the most dissatisfying experience of this comic however, has to be Steve Nile’s lack-lustre concluding instalment of “The Orphan”; a ten-page ‘swansong’ which whilst well-drawn by Val Mayerik, appears to be devoid of much of the charm and emotion which made some of its previous chapters such engaging reads. Indeed the entire plot to this ‘tearful tale’ is rather confusing, as Bot-Bot once again bizarrely faces the robot he’s previously destroyed on a couple of occasions.

Strangely it isn’t entirely clear how his foe has managed to reconstruct himself, nor why the murderous machine would send a multi-wheeled spy-bot to simply observe Rosemary and not just kill her. Bot-Bot’s decision to activate his own “self-destruct” in order to save his ‘human ward’ is also an odd resolution considering the resulting explosion resembles that of a nuclear bomb and the lonely girl was nearby when it took place. But there again in Nile’s post-apocalyptic future fruit trees can mature from seed within a year, so maybe children can withstand nuclear fall-out..?

The variant cover art of "ZOMBIES VS. ROBOTS" No. 6 by Mark Torres

Where Monsters Dwell #2 - Marvel Comics

WHERE MONSTERS DWELL No. 2, August 2015

It is very clear from the narrative of Issue Two of “Where Monsters Dwell” that “writer Garth Ennis loves dinosaurs.” For the Northern Irish-born American comic book author has somehow managed to cram into this magazine’s twenty pages some of the largest most ferocious prehistoric beasts known to Mankind and do so whilst still providing “an old-fashioned, rip-roaring adventure with a strong streak of humour running through it”.

Indeed whether the reader be a fan of the iconic Tyrannosaurus Rex, the reptilian Sarcosuchus or the predatory Megalodon, the Eisner Award-winner’s storyline ensures “they’re huge, they’re noisy, they look fantastic, they rip everything in sight to pieces, and they stretch human imagination beyond its limits”.

Admittedly the “Preacher” collaborator’s “black” comedy occasionally strays close to the ‘mature’ mark with the odd swearword or uncomfortable adult reference, such as when the Phantom Eagle offers to keep “the fetching Clemmie Franklin-Cox” warm overnight and insensitively suggests that “if it comes to it you can always have a… whatchamacallit… abortion”. But in the main Ennis’ script, which includes the “flying Ace” inadvertently leading a ‘lizard king’ straight into the centre of a hapless pygmy village, is a wonderfully witty non-stop thrill ride with plenty of gory tongue-in-cheek moments; “Nightmare, some kind of awful nightmare - Oh God, just let me wake up --!"

Equally as engaging as the flawed character of Karl Kaufmann is the World War One fighter pilot’s acidic passenger, Clemmie. The young woman’s pithy banter with her cowardly would-be-bedfellow provides several laugh out loud moments within the book, especially as the combat aviator becomes increasingly stressed and terrorised by “giant lizards and pushy broads” and won’t “stop bleating for five minutes…”

However undoubtedly the main draw for this comic is the outstanding artwork of one of Ennis’ “all-time favourite collaborators” Russ Braun, a man whose pencilling “makes it all look effortless and easy, when of course it isn’t at all.” “There’s an old-school quality” to the New Yorker’s illustrations which not only brings the dinosaurs to dynamic bone-crunching life but also imbues the “general jerk” with plenty of waggish touches which only add to the airman’s hilarious panicky antics.

Writer: Garth Ennis, Artist: Russ Braun and Color Artist: Dono Sanchez Almara

Star Wars #5 - Marvel Comics

STAR WARS No. 5, July 2015

Followers of the cult bounty hunter Boba Fett should be rather pleased with Issue Five of “Star Wars” as Jason Aaron’s script spends a considerable amount of time focusing on the murderous Mandalorian’s machinations. In fact the dangerous ‘unaltered clone of Jango’ features so prominently throughout the comic’s twenty pages it is hard to understand why “Marvel Worldwide” didn’t insist upon advertising his pronounced presence as part of the book’s main cover illustration; or perhaps selling an astonishing 146,850 copies was enough for the New York City-based publisher in May 2015…

Regardless the ruthless killer is most definitely at his most brutal within this magazine as he coldly searches Tatooine for any clue as to the identity of the Rebel pilot who destroyed the Death Star. Indeed those foolish enough to oppose Fett’s mission for the Dark Lord of the Sith swiftly discover he’s yet to adopt a “no disintegrations” policy… Though not before the notorious exterminator has tortured the information he wants from their battered and broken bodies.

Far less effective is the Alabama-born writer’s (mis)use of Han Solo and Leia Organa. It is quite clear that the couple’s scenes, both on board the Rebel Fleet and then later in a stolen Imperial shuttlecraft, are little more than desperate attempts by the American author to try and recapture some of the wonderful tension and chemistry shown between the pair during the film “The Empire Strikes Back”. However without Harrison Ford’s roguish delivery and Carrie Fisher’s frosty stares neither character successfully comes across to the reader as being particularly likeable. Especially the Corellian smuggler, who oafishly throws their stolen ride into a suspicious-looking descent just as its escorting TIE-fighters have cleared its flight path.

Equally as poorly thought out seems to be Luke Skywalker’s return to his planet of birth, Tatooine. Having decided to visit Obi-Wan Kenobi’s homestead, the Rebel pilot bizarrely lands his X-wing fighter in the desert a considerable distance from “Ben’s house.” So far away in fact that it is almost night by the time the young Jedi trainee arrives at his destination and engages in a disappointing rematch with a horde of pillaging Sand-People. This is arguably lazy writing on the part of Aaron and a plot point solely and sloppily engineered simply to have Boba Fett and his prey encounter one another in the comic’s final full-page splash; “Artoo? What happened? I can’t see!”

The regular cover art of "STAR WARS" No. 5 by John Cassaday and Laura Martin