Conan The Barbarian #8 - Marvel Comics

CONAN THE BARBARIAN No. 8, September 2019

Weighing in as the fifty-sixth best-selling comic of July 2019, following an increase in circulation of over fifteen hundred copies, it is debatably difficult to see just why this particular instalment of the ongoing series proved quite so popular. True, Jason Aaron’s script for Issue Eight of “Conan The Barbarian” revolves around the adventurer returning to “the hills of his homeland in Cimmeria” having “travelled, survived and thrived… through the Hyborian Age.” But it soon degenerates into an incredibly contrived tale involving Thoth-Amon, and the Master of the Black Ring’s utterly bizarre scheme to have his revenge upon the titular character by somehow infecting Gwawl the local dog keeper “with some new wild mutts.”

Of course, the idea that the evil wizard would be hell bent upon taking his revenge against his arch-nemesis (and the sword and sorcery hero’s barbaric people) is nothing new within the long-running “Marvel Worldwide” books. Nor is the Stygian sorcerer’s ability to strike out against his foes from his serpent-filled Tower using all manner of evil machinations and slithering spells. However, just why the “snake worshipper” would go to all the convoluted trouble to time his attack upon Conan’s village just before the wanderer returns smacks of a compulsive obsession to kill “one lone fool of a barbarian” far above anything which is ever depicted in the literary works of Robert E. Howard.

Similarly as unbelievable is the Alabama-born author’s implausible solution that the Cimmerian just happened to have with him a number of “gifts, from the kingdoms beyond”, which enable the “lumbering” fighter to harmlessly incapacitate his former friends. Just how the black-haired warrior managed to keep “one bag of… edible jewels” from the Sugar Masters of distant Ophir safe and sound through all his voyages is incalculable, as is the apparent suggestion that he also carried “one crystal rose of Lemuria” in his knapsack as well; a gift so delicate that it immediately breaks into a myriad of shards when its inadvertently dropped upon the snow…  

Mercifully however, “Homecoming” is somewhat salvaged by the gritty storyboards of Gerardo Zaffino, whose heavily pencilled, square-formed figures, genuinely imbue this publication’s preposterous plot with some much needed gravitas and grit. Indeed, whether it be the utterly disturbing look in the maniacal, red-eyed would-be murderers, or writhing snakes infesting Gwawl’s horrifically decaying head, the freelancer ramps up this comic’s intensity in a way Aaron’s penmanship could never hope to attain.

Writer: Jason Aaron, Artists: Gerardo Zaffino with Garry Brown, and Colorist: Matthew Wilson

The Immortal Hulk #22 - Marvel Comics

IMMORTAL HULK No. 22, October 2019

Crammed to the rafters with more characters and conversation than its 62,053 readers could probably believe possible within a Hulk comic book, it is easy to see why at the time Al Ewing stated he was “very busy” when interviewed by the American website “Newsarama”. Yet whilst the British writer seemed to think that that was “a good problem to have”, so heavy a workload seems to have caused his script to “Who’s There” to become little more than a debatably dreary twenty-page periodical, with nothing in the way of action occurring except Rick Jones’ dramatic transformation back to the land of the living…

For starters, the majority of this publication seems to focus far too much upon the dialogue driven antics of Bruce Banner, whether it be the mild-mannered nuclear physicist mentally breaking down when Betty Ross refuses to transform back into her human guise for him, or in his much more confident Joe Fixit persona. These wordy-heavy, plodding scenes provide very little progress to the plot, and arguably just act as an unnecessary reminder to the perusing Hulk-Heads that Thunderbolt’s daughter clearly still has issues with her ex-husband, and “Sunshine Joe” seems to have developed an appreciation of Jacqueline McGee’s work as a reporter; “And holy c%*p, lady. You sure know how to p&*s off the puny humans.”

Similarly as sedentary are the passages set deep beneath Groom Lake at Shadow Base Site D, where Doctor McGowan perhaps finally realises just how utterly insane General Fortean actually is, having witnessed the soldier 'willingly' bond with the Abomination. Bleeding green ooze from the nose and ignorant as to “what the gamma is doing to your internal organs, or -- or your mind --”, Reginald’s self-deluding belief that he is “in control here” seems a million miles away from the actual truth.

Admittedly, the grotesque-looking, green-skinned gestalt looks incredibly intimidating, and penciler Joe Bennett does a first-rate job of permeating the brutish monstrosity with some marvellous menace. But it’s hard to maintain such a perturbing presence panel after seemingly endless panel when all Subject B actually does is literally stand with his arms folded across his scaly chest and wax lyrical to Doc Samson and Omega Flight about how far his “new wave of psychic surveillance technicians can reach…”

Writer: Al Ewing, Penciler: Joe Bennett, and Colorist: Paul Mounts

Death-Defying 'Devil #3 - Dynamite Entertainment

DEATH-DEFYING 'DEVIL No. 3, October 2019

Despite Gail Simone’s utterly bizarre belief that fans of this comic’s titular character from the Forties would enjoy an ‘anything can happen with the next twenty-two pages” nonsensical narrative, the Oregon-born writer’s storyline for Issue Three of “The Death-Defying Devil” actually contains a pretty compelling adventure which disconcertingly deals with the issues faced by an elderly super-hero who can no longer even walk without the aid of a Zimmer frame, let alone dispatch his foes with his infamous razor edged boomerangs. Indeed, if the American author had simply ditched the idea that all the elder abuse depicted within this book was actually caused by the machinations of a daemonic entity determined to steal the souls of an apartment block’s tenants, and instead solely focus upon the caregivers preying upon their vulnerable patients just to bolster their own self-importance, then this book would arguably have been all the more impactive.

As it stands however, an aged Bart Hill’s desperate battle to evade the brutal clutches of Freddy and Derek is somewhat lessened by the World War Two veteran’s persistent trips to an inter-dimensional place and discomfiting conversations with a little girl wearing a toy unicorn horn on her head; “But you really don’t belong in this time… You defied the calendar. You defied life and death.” True, the young child provides the white-haired, somewhat frail Daredevil with the solution to all his problems within the Winslow Convalescent Home, by restoring the man’s youth and re-arming him with a pair of “two-pound stainless steel ball bearing Frisbees.” But seeing as how the geriatric had already managed to batter both his attackers with a vicious blow to the face using his walking frame, as well as a jaw-dropping punch to the nether regions, it would have been far more interesting to see Jack Binder’s co-creation succeed via his own merits rather than relying upon a supernatural solution.

Perhaps this comic’s biggest positive takeaway is therefore the artwork of Walter Geovani, who manages to somehow etch the horror of his helplessness upon Hill’s face the moment he wakes up to discover he’s become an enfeebled shadow of his former crime-fighting self. The Brazilian artist does an incredible job of pencilling the physical menace Derek exudes whenever he threatens the patients, and any perusing bibliophile can surely hear the crack of bones when Bart quickly decides enough is enough and begins mercilessly brutalising his shocked would-be assailants.

The regular cover art of "DEATH-DEFYING 'DEVIL" No. 3 by Inhyuk Lee

Conan The Barbarian #7 - Marvel Comics

CONAN THE BARBARIAN No. 7, August 2019

Somewhat surprisingly depicting the titular character as a distraught, long-bearded rogue who is deep in mourning for his dead beloved Belit, Jason Aaron’s grim narrative for Issue Seven of “Conan The Barbarian” surely had a fair few of its 34,366 readers scratching their heads in bemusement. For although the depressed Cimmerian spends the vast majority of “Barbarian Love” surrounded by a bevy of magnificent pirate maidens who are all as deadly with a blade as they are exotic, the “fictional sword and sorcery hero” demonstrates a somewhat uncharacteristic disregard for carousing and revelling with the “dearies” until after this comic’s blood-thirsty conclusion.

Happily however, the Alabama-born author’s somewhat unrecognisable, ever-brooding warrior doesn’t detract too much from an otherwise intriguing tale concerning the heavily-bearded fighter ‘enjoying’ his revenge upon the fat trader Pheidus by throwing the overconfident fool into a river populated by crocodiles. Indeed, once the slightly pedestrian plot finally sees Conan facing his prey face-to-face, having had his female companions work “a lot of magic” upon his sour-smelling appearance, this twenty-page periodical’s script proves thoroughly entertaining, and it is actually a pity that the Hyborian Age hero’s partnership with the Barachan Isles beauties comes to an all-too abrupt end once the merchant is murdered; “After everything we’ve been through together. To just leave us here like this.”

Just as disappointing as this tale’s brusque conclusion is the American writer’s frustrating laziness when it comes to the Cimmerian’s 'super-human' abilities, and the man’s miraculous aptitude to cheat death no matter what the odds. The warrior’s brief battle against a pack of large wolves early on within this comic seems reasonable enough, considering he is armed with both sword and long-knife, as well as able to whittle the large canines down to a manageable handful with just a single thrust of his blades.

But later on Conan is made completely helpless with ropes, before being thrown into some crocodile-infested waters head-first. The odds genuinely seem stacked against his survival even after one of the women throws a sword into the lake after him, and yet within seconds, Aaron would have his audience believe the mighty adventurer had somehow reached the hand-weapon despite his legs and arms being tightly bound, cut himself free of his formidable bonds, and then butchered at least three of the hungry, large semi-aquatic reptiles without needing any air whatsoever..?

The regular cover art of "CONAN THE BARBARIAN" No. 7 by Esad Ribic

The Immortal Hulk #21 - Marvel Comics

IMMORTAL HULK No. 21, September 2019

Whilst many onlookers may well be able to persuasively argue that this particular issue of “The Immortal Hulk” probably saw its readership drop by a staggering thirty thousand readers in July 2019 due to the title’s fortnightly release schedule, it is also easy to see why many of this twenty-page periodical’s potential customers were probably put off by Guest Artist Ryan Bodenheim’s stagnant storyboards. True, the professional illustrator’s clean-lined pencilling does an admirable job of depicting General Fortean’s covert mission on board the Alpha Flight Space Station. But the American’s panels are so devoid of life and two dimensional, that even when the United States Air Force officer brutally slays Doc Samson and Walter Langkowski, their cold-blooded killings still lack much in the way of any emotion or dynamism.

Sadly, so uninspiring an appearance genuinely robs “A Secret Order” of some rather well-penned moments, such as the Absorbing Man shockingly being reduced to a blob of Fentanyl mid-way through a conversation with Titania, and resultantly one can only imagine the disappointment Al Ewing felt when he first saw what drawings Paul Mounts had to work with whilst colouring this comic book. Indeed, it is debatably hard to imagine a more coldly sterile portrayal of a space-based murder spree, especially when this publication’s conclusion ends with one of the youngest Major General’s “to ever hold the rank” being horrifically absorbed into the Abomination’s corpse after he foolishly decides to touch its blubbery flesh.

To make matters worse though, the British writer’s insistence on peppering his narrative with flashbacks to Fortean’s younger days, doesn’t debatably help this comic’s publication’s pedantic pace either, with an eleven year-old Reginald experiencing a supposedly super-inspiring church sermon to respect “our brave fighting forces” being the most tedious of the lot. In addition, a few of these jarring intrusions upon the senior soldier’s orbital rampage make it difficult to determine just why an old war horse like Thunderbolt Ross counted so heavily upon the man, when he clearly froze upon fighting the Hulk for the first time; “I am unable to process what I am seeing. I -- I Just -- How can we keep -- fighting this -- this thing --”

Thaddeus is predominantly projected in the comics as someone with a compulsive obsession over defeating Bruce Banner’s alter ego, to the point where he is willingly transformed “into the Red Hulk in order to better combat his nemesis.” Yet, in these frustrating interludes with his protégé, he’s depicted as someone who rather than admonishing the Major for his failure on the front line, tells Fortean “never [to] apologise for being human” and even astonishingly admits to “Reggie” that he too has felt “the impossibility of this… situation” and suffers “my moments of… of doubt.”

First published on the "Dawn of Comics" website.'

Writer: Al Ewing, Guest Artist: Ryan Bodenheim, and Color Artist: Paul Mounts

The Immortal Hulk #20 - Marvel Comics

IMMORTAL HULK No. 20, September 2019

Shifting an impressive 83,059 copies in July 2019, at least according to “Diamond Comic Distributors”, this ninth best-selling title of the month seemingly replaced Al Ewing’s long-running narrative to explore “the Hulk as representative of… [the Devil’s] darker side, the shadow side of ourselves” with a mouth-watering, action-packed fun-fest which sees Bruce Banner’s alter-ego brutalising a pair of General Fortean’s awesome-looking War Wagons. In fact, such is the sheer carnage on show, that it’s debatably difficult not to feel the British writer had momentarily taken his incarnation of the jade Goliath back to the Bronze Age of comics, when the green-skinned behemoth was predominantly just an unthinking, wrecking machine; “Wagon One -- Wagon Two -- Report status, please -- What -- What just happened --?”

Sadly however, such a pulse-pounding endeavour disappointingly doesn’t start until halfway through the twenty-page periodical, as the book’s opening scene rather tediously depicts the “emotionally reserved physicist” once again talking to his abusive father in the Below-Place. This wordy-heavy, dialogue-driven confrontation is disconcertingly slow, to the point where even a tearful, fleeting appearance of Banner’s mother can’t help energise a thoroughly tedious debate as to whether gamma radiation is “a measurable scientific phenomenon” or “from another angle -- from above, or below -- it’s a magic spell.”

For those readers willing to endure such a dreary discourse though, the subsequent sight of a “hard reset” Hulk knocking the new Abomination into tomorrow is well worth the wait, and delightfully is just a taste of things to come following Fortean’s calculatingly cold decision to “cauterise” the situation once his heavily-armed flying machines “have your monsters in sight, plus the loose end.” Whether it be the Harpy’s unbelievably vicious mid-air scrap with Subject B, where Betty Ross persistently claws away at her hideous rival’s flesh-melting digestive system, or the titular character’s decision to pummel War Wagon Two into its compatriot with a sound barrier-breaking punch, Joe Bennett’s pencilling is absolutely top notch, and packs every single pulse-pounding panel with enthralling, energetic life.

Admittedly, these sense-shattering shenanigans sadly come to a resolution all-too soon, with the Hulk tearing open the badly-beaten Abomination in order to reveal a significantly shrivelled Rick Jones curled up inside the creature’s corpse, and General Fortean ordering his forces to “pull back” following the arrival of Walter Langkowski’s Omega Flight. But even so, this fight sequence is so ferociously fast-paced that it is undoubtedly worth this comic’s cover price alone.

First published on the "Dawn of Comics" website.'

Writer: Al Ewing, Penciler: Joe Bennett, and Colorist: Paul Mounts

Black Terror #4 - Dynamite Entertainment

BLACK TERROR No. 4, January 2020

Firmly fixated upon the horrors of the Second Indochina War and the savage barbarity of American Sergeant Gary Greeley, Max Bemis’ script for Issue Four of “Black Terror” arguably provided something of a unique take on the conflict’s brutal repercussions for any surviving Vietnam era veteran. Indeed, the twenty-three page periodical’s plot arguably even manages to generate some considerable sympathy for the villainous Bad Groove, by gratuitously depicting just what wartime experiences made the star-shaped glasses-wearing druggie into the one-handed, sabre-carrying hoodlum Bob Benton dramatically beats up; “I won’t be attending prison again, sir.”

For starters, it’s clear that the Armed Forces never gave “Dumps” much of a fighting chance whilst he was in training, thanks solely to the prejudices of Greeley, and his insane delight in repeatedly abusing the soldier verbally. Thick-jawed and heavily-boned, the Sergeant is portrayed as a stereotypical bully in every respect, yet it isn’t until after Groove has been badly maimed in a frightening Viet Cong ambush that a chortling Gary sinks to his darkest depths by simply leaving the badly maimed “outcast” to the enemy so they can “make him hurt” all the more.

This tortuous affair clearly sets up the heavily-moustached Groove upon his life as a highly colourful criminal, and resultantly it is with genuine compassion that, having experienced his foe’s past courtesy of a drug-fuelled flashback, Black Terror tenderly touches the back of the man’s head after the crook has slit his own throat in a last, desperate attempt to evade incarceration. Delightfully, “Dumps” demise doesn’t however bring this publication to so demoralising an end, but instead leads Benton on a quest to confront a now wheelchair-bound Greely in the non-commissioned ranked soldier’s Tampa-based retirement bungalow.

The unexpected consequences of this meeting, especially following Bob’s green-coloured vomit somehow ‘infecting’ the slovenly oldster with Groove’s traumatising memories, provides artist Ruairi Coleman with an opportunity to pencil easily one of the most gruesomely shocking demises this book’s bibliophiles could probably imagine. The Northern Irishman's sketch of a quietly whistling invalid calmly 'wheeling' himself up to the swamp’s edge so as to await the ghastly fate he has apparently decided upon to “make it up to you, Dumps…” is packed full of pathos, and splendidly contrasts with the Florida alligator viciously disembowelling Gary in a disconcerting display of intestines soon afterwards.

The regular cover art of "BLACK TERROR" No. 4 by Rahzzah