King Conan #4 - Marvel Comics

KING CONAN No. 4, July 2022

Focusing far more upon “a duel that will change the course of the Hyborian Age” than the arguably less satisfying (and unconvincing) tale of the titular character being shipwrecked upon a tiny isle of the Undead with a “Stygian snake-kisser” for company, Jason Aaron’s storyline for Issue Four of “King Conan” probably still didn’t convince many long-time fans of Robert E. Howard’s creation that the sword and sorcery hero was in particularly safe hands. Sure, the aforementioned swordfight between Aquilonia’s King and his heir depicts some diverting moments as young Conn bravely stands tall in the face of his father’s plan to banish him from the kingdom. However, it's abundantly clear that the Cimmerian will never meaningfully harm his son with a permanently debilitating blow from his blade, so any sense of genuine tension is abundantly missing, as is a healthy dose of logic behind the Barbarian’s bizarre behaviour.

Indeed, debatably one of this twenty-page plot’s biggest disappointments is how the Alabama-born author pens a deeply disturbed monarch taking out his evident frustrations at being a successful ruler upon his adolescent son, and then suddenly, tearfully deciding to abdicate when he’s dubiously bested by the boy; “By Crom. When did you become such a man? My son. My King.” L. Sprague de Camp and Lin Carter’s 1968 novel “Conan Of The Isles” certainly has its shortcomings, but at least the Sixty-something Sovereign is goaded into abandoning his throne due to the sorcerous sacrifice of his old friend, Count Trocero of Poitian and another stern warning from the ancient prophet, Epemitreus, rather than because he’s bored and implausibly disarmed by his physically inferior child.

Possibly just as farfetched is Aaron’s attempt to have artist Mahmud Asrar pencil a clearly fatigued Cimmerian besting a confined cave full of murderous killer apes with just a single punch to the jaw and a limb-severing sword swipe. This demonstration of well-sketched barbaric ferocity is supposedly enough to stave off the remaining three formidably sized gorillas so the weary adventurer can make good his escape from the clutches of the (retconned/redesigned) Princess Prima along with a bleeding Thoth-Amon, and even supposedly provides the unlikely comrades-in-arms with more than enough time for them to dangerously stop just a little way further down the hollow to discuss the benefits of their dubious double-act.

The regular cover art of "KING CONAN" #4 by Mahmud Asrar & Matthew Wilson

Batgirls #1 - DC Comics

BATGIRLS No. 1, February 2022

Unreservedly supplying “the pizza slumber party of the year you don’t want to miss”, Becky Cloonan and Michael Conrad’s narrative for Issue One of “Batgirls” must surely have pleased the better part of its audience when it first hit the spinner racks in December 2021 with its combination of boundless energy and pulse-pounding pugilism. True, the twenty-two-page periodical does contain a few sedentary, dialogue-heavy scenes in which the dynamic duo’s brand-new set-up on “the other side of town” is established. Yet such exposition is entirely necessary for those unfamiliar with the limitations being imposed upon their lives by the hacker Seer, and are frequently interrupted whenever Stephanie Brown wants to escape outside to pummel the local evildoers’ brains.

Indeed, one of this comic’s most endearing features is the restlessness of its cast, and the resultant trips into the “dark, gritty and oftentimes scary city of Gotham” to either seek revenge upon some idiotic muggers who take an unhealthy shine to Cassandra Cain’s favourite ‘unicorn’ robe, or rescue some mysteriously mind-controlled maintenance workers. Such interludes really help break-up some of this storyline’s more pedestrian moments with a quick blast of high-octane action, and also better emphasises just how chaotic the upheaval for Barbara Gordon and her two high-spirited friends really is.

Similarly as well-penned is this book’s underlying plot-thread that the titular characters have inadvertently landed themselves a residential flat smack bang in the middle of some nefarious crime wave. Whether the Batgirls’ “grumpy neighbour” really is the district’s sinister serial killer arguably sounds like something of a red herring. But there’s no doubting something evilly intriguing is taking place following the super-heroines’ encounter with a party of mantra-moaning fluorescent coat-wearing builders; “The strange workers eventually wandered off, and they called in the mugging from their burner phones.”

Helping imbue this publication with all its energetic, sense-shattering shenanigans are Jorge Corona’s layouts and Sarah Stern’s gorgeous palette of colours. The Russ Manning Promising Newcomer Award-winning artist does a particularly fine job in pencilling the protagonists’ scrappy fighting style, with lots of high kicks, synchronised double-punches and incredible-looking athletic leaps, as well as providing Cain’s masked alter-ego with some genuinely humorous demoralised looks when she is being scolded by her mentor for staying out until three in the morning.

Story: Becky Cloonan & Michael Conrad, Art: Jorge Corona, and Colors: Sarah Stern

Rick And Morty Verses Dungeons & Dragons II: Painscape #4 - IDW Publishing

RICK AND MORTY VERSES DUNGEONS & DRAGONS II: PAINSCAPE No. 4, December 2019

Depicting “the final battle between demons, gods, and the most min-maxed Rick imaginable”, Jim Zub’s narrative for Issue Four of “Rick And Morty Verses Dungeons & Dragons II: Painscape” surely must have had any players of Gary Gygax’s co-creation appreciatively frothing at the mouth with all its excellent nods to the rule-set’s celebrated lore. Indeed, considering that this comic contains such notable weapons as “the legendary Dragonlance (enhanced with Boo, miniature giant space-hamster)” and “The unholy Wand of Orcus” it’s arguably easy to see why the mini-series’ final instalment managed to maintain a 11,226-strong readership in January 2020.

Furthermore, these intermittent dips into “an ancient conflict that raged between the fiends of the Lower planes” and the Caves of Klang genuinely provide the twenty-two-page publication with both some ludicrous laugh-out-loud jiffies, as well as some surprisingly dark moments; most notably when the Canadian writer pens the Smith Family individually meeting a truly unheroic demise before the overwhelming demonic hordes of Bardrick. Such contrasting emotional journeys really help to keep the audience engaged with the decapitation-laden action at hand, even when it consists of some seriously silly skirmishes during “the real Blood War at the Hobby Mall -- Now.”

Quite possibly this periodical’s finest moment though, comes with the coverage of Rick Sanchez following the Level Five Wizard’s decision “to shakety-shake things up a bit” and delve into multi-classing. The elderly scientist’s short-lived battles against a Manticore, Medusa and Frost Giant are a lot of fun to follow, as is the subsequent Rogue’s friendship with a Beholder which ultimately ends in the floating head’s unexpectedly sad death, and a significantly older-looking adventurer grasping the “Ring of Three Ultra-Wishes – A bulls**t item younger Rick came up with as the ultimate treasure in his ultimate dungeon.”

Also plying his trade most prodigiously is Troy Little, whose well-pencilled panels are absolutely packed full of all sorts of eye-candy. The cartoonist’s depiction of the Blood War is particularly gruesome, courtesy of numerous severed limbs and cleaved heads being visible during the intense fighting. And let us not forget the incredibly insensitive demise of poor Boo, loyal companion of the Rashemi ranger Minsc, who is explicitly fried alive by Sanchez’s evil musical counterpart following a tragic blow from the demon lord Orcus’s obsidian rod.

Written by: Jim Zub, Illustrated by: Troy Little, and Colored by: Leonardo Ito

King Conan #3 - Marvel Comics

KING CONAN No. 3, April 2022

Leaving the heavy criticisms targeted at Jason Aaron for this comic’s alleged “sexualisation of a character, whose real-life story is one of rape and abuse”, as well as its Alabama-born author’s subsequent public apology, to internet news sites such as “Bleeding Cool”, there’s arguably not a great deal about the publication’s twenty-page plot which would have entertained its 6,854 readers in February 2022. Indeed, with the exception of a short-lived, surprisingly touching sequence depicting Conan’s evident liking for his now zombified shipmate Thomasso, “The Princess Of Golden Ruin” continues with this mini-series’ monotonous depiction the Cimmerian repeatedly hacking his way through an innumerable army of deceased mariners; “By Crom. I’ll slay every dead man in the sea if I must!!!”

Thankfully, such senseless slaughter does eventually come to an end once the Barbarian decides he’d prefer to tackle some “Red Apes from Khitai” singlehandedly on top of a mountainous outcrop rather than more salty, stinking walking cadavers. However, this questionable survival decision leads on to the introduction of the “ill-considered” Princess Matoaka and a somewhat lengthy interlude depicting her treachery-fuelled, blood-soaked origin in “a land of plenty, farther west across the many waters.” Of course, the establishment of a “supernatural, thousand-year-old princess of a cursed island” surrounding herself with the corpses of greedy pirates does at least provide some sort of explanation behind the predicament currently facing Aquilonia’s former monarch. Yet such a contrivance as Conan and his deadly nemesis Thoth Amon simultaneously being shipwrecked upon the small landmass still debatably tests even the most willing suspension of disbelief.

Equally as unpersuasive is Aaron’s bizarre plot of her “Highness” building a boat “made from the fingernails of the Dead” to lure “a man… virile enough to ferry us across the churning sea.” The vessel both sounds and appears truly repugnant, and it probably comes as no surprise to any fan of Robert E. Howard’s creation that the veteran warrior of a hundred battles immediately senses a treacherous trap. Just why any person would willingly board such a distasteful vessel is debatably incomprehensible, especially when the two-person vessel contains no supplies, provisions, oars, sail or any other means of propulsion for that matter.

In fact, perhaps the only entertaining element to Issue Three of “King Conan” comes at its very end, when the comic flashes back to Conn’s shocking banishment by his father, and the young man’s typically ‘Cimmerian’ response to tackle it head on, sword in hand. This dual on horseback, well-pencilled by artist Mahmud Asrar and moodily coloured by Matthew Wilson, genuinely provides the book with so intriguing a cliff-hanger that it’s a pity this secondary storyline wasn't given much more ‘screen time.’

Writer: Jason Aaron, Artist: Mahmud Asrar, and Color Artist: Matthew Wilson

X-Men Legends #7 - Marvel Comics

X-MEN LEGENDS No. 7, November 2021

Proudly proclaiming that “the ultimate team-up is back, bub!” this twenty-page periodical’s script is arguably packed full of the violent, no-nonsense close combat which helped make Wolverine “Wizard” magazine’s top Comic Book Character in 2008. In fact, Larry Hama’s writing for Issue Seven of “X-Men Legends” is arguably so good at promptly transporting its 27,254 strong audience back to the American author’s celebrated run on “Wolverine” in the Nineties that it is hard to believe the book was only the one hundred and seventh best-selling title of September 2021; “I hear there might be somebody here interested in some fresh merchandise.”

For starters, “Kidnapped!” drops the reader straight into its “all-new adventure” by having both Logan and Jubilee immediately face deadly danger on the rain-soaked streets of Osaka, Japan. Obviously, the super-powered pair’s apparent enfeeblement is all a ploy to lower the guard of their overconfident ‘captors’. But with so many blades being bandied about, and their owners' evident willingness to lethally stick them into the “Gaijin” without any remorse, it is debatably difficult to peruse the resulting fracas without at least worrying a little about Jubilation Lee’s wellbeing.

Indeed, one of this narrative’s most enthralling threads is Hama’s incarnation of Wolverine almost flat out refusing to dodge any incoming sword slice or stabbing motion, as he seemingly prefers to just rely upon his healing factor to survive the torrent of chops, hacks and cuts he receives whilst fighting his way through an almost overwhelming number of the Hand’s deadly assassins in an aquarium. This utter abandonment provides some mesmerising moments, not least of which is one of this publication’s earliest incidents when a child trafficker nonchalantly ‘befriends’ the seemingly unsuspecting Logan and sticks him with a long knife straight through the chest.

Capturing all the frantic, fast-paced flavour of this tale in the Kansai region of Honshu with his prodigious pencils is Billy Tan, whose ability to project the sheer loathing Lady Deathstrike holds for her colourfully costumed rival is genuinely palpable. Likewise, the Malaysian artist does a corking job in illustrating the sheer number of voiceless assassins who suddenly descend upon the X-Men with their furious, brutal ninjatō swords and Wolverine's evident frustration at "these ladies" blocking his path to Yuriko Oyama.

Writer: Larry Hama, Artist: Billy Tan, and Colorist: Chris Sotomayor 

G-Men United #2 - G-Man Comics

G-MEN UNITED No.2, December 2021

Promising “four great tales from the G-Men in a single comic”, Eric N. Bennett’s script for “Thunder Struck” certainly gets this anthology title off to a rip-roaring start with both a notable nod to the Nazi-bashing antics depicted during the Golden Age, and its frenetically paced storytelling once events move forward to the hectic life of a modern-day speedster. However, whilst the Blue Bolt’s subsequent scintillating arrest of the villainous Thundervolt certainly provides artist Luis Rivera with plenty of opportunity to pencil a dynamically drawn chase across the waters of a local harbour, it’s the writer’s cliff-hanger of a conclusion in which Conrad Calvin’s alter-ego is shockingly accused of treachery against the Caped Agent Program that will surely have its readers clamouring for more within “the pages of the… First Guard.”

Equally as fascinating though is Rik Offenberger’s “The Double Life Of Ali Rashed” which on the face of it concerns the no-nonsense foiling of “an armed robbery at Empire City Pharmacy in Atlanta”. But in reality, explores the difficulty some protagonists face when they want to remain incognito from their friends and family. The yarn generates an arguably surprising element of empathy for Terror Noir in the reader as he is clearly thinking first and foremost about his co-workers’ safety throughout the crime, and yet ultimately loses their respect due to them erroneously believing him to be a coward who selfishly hid himself away during the entire raid; “Our lives were at risk and you were hiding! I Quit!”

Perhaps by far this publication’s bloodiest adventure concerns Sergeant Flag’s desperate mission to rescue “a cop captured by the Factory”. This five-pager very quickly gets down to the task at hand with Bobby Ragland sketching a sense-shattering tussle between the colourfully costumed super-hero and the appropriately named striped lycanthrope Tigerstrike. Indeed, the sheer viciousness of the weretiger genuinely leaps off the printed panel, and momentarily will make any perusing bibliophile believe that for once Rob McFarlane may well have bitten off more than he can chew with this mission.

“Rounding out the issue is Jim Burrows’ Who is Outrage?” which rather succinctly covers the origin story of the demon-fighting powerhouse from her grandfather’s days as a Tuskegee Airman “used for testing super-soldier protocols” through to the angry young woman finally accepting her place within the world as a registered crime-fighter. The author does a good job in penning the adolescent's frustration at the authorities for incarcerating her “papa” in an extraordinary maximum-security prison following his fall from grace, and her eventual realisation that she could do great good with her special abilities in the wake of Hurricane Katrina.

The regular cover art of "G-MEN UNITED" #2 by Bobby Ragland

Rick And Morty Verses Dungeons & Dragons II: Painscape #3 - IDW Publishing

RICK AND MORTY VERSES DUNGEONS & DRAGONS II: PAINSCAPE No. 3, November 2019

Plush with plenty of the slapstick humour which helped make Adult Swim’s animated television programme so critically acclaimed, Jim Zub’s storyline for Issue Three of “Rick And Morty Verses Dungeons & Dragons II: Painscape” certainly bounds along at an enjoyable pace, as the Smith Family desperately battle the demonic forces ‘wonkily named’ by the fantasy role-playing rule-set’s creators to try and convince parents that it was not “Satan’s game.” Yet whilst such a narrative creates a few laugh-out-loud moments, such as Jerry’s son using a sneak attack to annihilate Sorcerick with a standing lamp, it also arguably contains some rather lack-lustre moments which help explain the mini-series fall in sales to just 11,936 copies.

Foremost of these frustrating flaws is the way Rick Sanchez is seemingly wasted just wandering around his old, incomplete campaign setting, trying to determine whether there truly is “no way home” from the “little burg of graph paper regret” he created in his younger days. This initially slow, sedentary sequence does momentarily appear to contain a real gem of a plot idea when it forces the scientist to negotiate the Caves of Klang – a “masterpiece dungeon” the central protagonist forgot he wrote.

However, rather than depict the Level One Wizard using his wits for once as he encounters obstacles he was far from expecting, the storyline quickly degenerates into a series of simple conflicts between him and a quartet of his failed, previously rolled characters; “Man, you are the worst f*****g Rick I’ve seen since Doofus Rick from J19 Zeta 7…” Indeed, by the time Sanchez finally encounters the Level Six Elven Fighter, Warriorick and his cursed intelligent longsword, the utterly insane battle inside a busy, modern-day shopping mall involving Jerry, Summer and Beth has become much more entertaining.

Possibly this publication’s best asset therefore, alongside the excellent layouts of artist Troy Little, are all the nods to the extensive lore established by Gary Gygax’s co-creation which are scattered throughout its twenty-two pages. Much of this background is seemingly taken from the Second Edition sourcebook, Monstrous Compendium: Outer Planes Appendix, with the comic’s illustrator not only going so far as to pencil a recognisable likeness of the book’s cover, but also ensuring that its contents describing the Outer Planes are all clearly hole-punched.

Written by: Jim Zub, Illustrated by: Troy Little, and Colored by: Leonardo Ito