AGE OF ULTRON VS. MARVEL ZOMBIES No. 3, October 2015 |
It would be interesting to know whether Editor “Magnanimous Mark”
Paniccia had any hand in the fact that Issue Three of “Age Of Ultron Vs. Marvel
Zombies” starts rather unpromisingly with the desperately scrawled sentence
“It’s worse than we thought”. For despite all of James Robinson’s assurances
that “the battle lines will force everyone into two camps -- zombies verses
robots” and that “they’re definitely at war” this bitterly disappointing
publication's narrative not only depicts a unified Ultron-Zombie
host threatening Jim Hammond, the Vision and Wonderman. But one which actually
consists of “the worst of both” forces following the adamantium-alloyed automaton’s
experiments to combine “the inorganic and the dead”.
To make matters even worse for this twenty-page periodical’s
dramatically declining 36,388 readers however, the former “Superman” writer
doesn’t even provide this ‘possible intriguing merger’ with much ‘screen time’
and instead decides to regale any bibliophiles foolish enough to have bought
this “Secret Wars” tie-in title with uninspiring insights into Hank Pym’s
desperate attempts to understand how “the Pym of this domain done built hisself
a compoota rowbot man”, Simon William’s love for a female Iron Cross incarnation, Agatha Harkness’
adoration of the green and gold-garbed “creation of order” and a thirteen-panel
discussion between Ryoko and “the original Human Torch” as to their understandable
concerns surrounding her “synthetic” pregnancy.
Unfortunately, all of this disinteresting exposition is actually the
highlight of Robinson’s storyline when compared to the British writer’s
inclusion of a lengthy flashback to “the Town o’ Timely” from whence this mini-series’
gun-slinging Wasp originated from. Just why Starman’s co-creator felt it
necessary to subject his audience to six shockingly dire pages deliberating
over a dancing girl’s rise to infamy as one of the “people with a stupid plan
ta overthrow ol’ man Roxxon ‘n’ his whole darn outfit” defies logic and clearly
suggests that the author’s much lauded “really cool twist” for a mini-series
probably wasn’t all that great in the first place.
Likewise, Steve Pugh’s strength clearly lies in illustrating “reanimated hordes
[who] crave live flesh”, as opposed to depicting people enjoying a 'sedentary' existence, as the former “Strontium Dog” sketcher provides some
terrifically disturbing pictures of a zombified Magneto, Super Skrull and
Sabretooth throughout this comic. Sadly, such ‘eye
candy’ is though shamefully scarce as the majority of this magazine’s script instead
concerns itself with events transpiring within the Deadlands sanctuary of Salvation;
sequences which clearly failed to inspire its artist to deliver nothing but the
most mediocre of visualisations.
The variant cover art of "AGE OF ULTRON VS. MARVEL ZOMBIES" No. 3 by Francesco Francavilla |
Oh dear! One to avoid, me thinks! Sorry you had to suffer on our behalf, Simon.
ReplyDeleteTruly dire sadly Bryan... and the final issue is sadly the worst of the lot :-(
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